Are all of your needs met? Do you know why you make the decisions you do?
Our needs motivate our behavior. If you respond to life’s events from a low level of survival, it’ll be more difficult to succeed in a loving relationship or keep steady employment or even gain a level of self-esteem and confidence. Let alone being able to pursue your hobby and passions. When you can start responding to the events in life from a place of fulfilling your purpose, over the lower-level needs of surviving and safety, you will find that you will take bigger steps towards your growth. Reaching your potential in life has to start with a shift in your motivation to realize success and fulfillment.
“When you are motivated to fulfill your need to grow and learn and be the most you can be, you might surprise yourself at how far you’ll go to make that happen”
What you’ll learn in this article:
- We talk about Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs
- Your behavior is highly dependent on your needs
- You are motivated to behave by your need for survival, safety, love, self-esteem and potential
- If you don’t have needs met at a certain level, you will never feel fulfilled
- By learning what motivates you, you can utilize it whenever you need it
- If every need was fulfilled, you’d lack motivation
- Find out how close ego comes to esteem, and how to avoid inflating the ego
- If you are at one level of needs and your partner is at another, you may find your relationship suffers
- By knowing why you behave, you can choose to change that behavior next time
- Without a certain level of self-respect and confidence, you’ll have a difficult time reaching your full potential
- Learn a neat trick to motivate you right away
Resources:
Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs:
Today is all about learning what motivates you and why you make the decisions you do. In other words, when you make a decision, you are motivated by something to make that decision. Whether that’s something happening in your life, in your environment, your relationships, or other internal-external factors.
By the time you’re done reading this article, you’ll know why you’re motivated the way you are and where your motivation comes from. You’ll learn to see what drives other people’s behavior too. If you wonder why someone acts the way they do, this article will help you get to the bottom of it.
Knowing what motivates you will help you gain clarity in what your needs are. When you can meet your basic needs, you can focus on higher-level needs to help make you whole and reach your full potential. When you aren’t meeting your basic needs, you’ll always be skirting the edge of survival. If you need to find food every day, your motivation will be to stay in basic survival mode, and it will be a challenge to get away from that until you find a way to meet that need on a regular basis.
Near the end of the article, I’ll give you an almost guaranteed technique that, when you use it, will motivate you to do anything. It’s especially useful if you find yourself procrastinating on a project or something else that you need to get done. It’s a neat trick I learned in my studies, and I’d love to walk you through the process.
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I want you to think about what motivates you the most. What motivates you to take action? I’m talking about the stuff you’d rather not do, but something motivates you to do it. For example, for me, accountability motivates me to do things I wouldn’t do otherwise if no one expected me to.
Accountability is when someone else is expecting you to do something you said you’d do. As much as I don’t want to do something, I don’t want to disappoint or not meet someone’s expectations even more. In fact, this motivates me so greatly I’ll skip a meal, lose sleep and even work in extreme conditions just to make sure that I come through on my promise to them.
Knowing that soon they will want to know how I’m doing on a project or whatever is so motivating for me that I’ll do anything to get that project done.
The funny part is that I don’t like being held accountable. Being held accountable is typically an unpleasant experience; however, I know it motivates me to complete a task so when I really want to get something done, I tell someone I’m going to do it. Their expectation motivates me to come through.
I don’t always do this when I want to accomplish a task or goal, but when I know I’ll procrastinate otherwise, I make sure someone knows. Being held accountable is motivating to me.
Think of what motivates you, even if you don’t like it. For some people is the fear of disappointing someone else. For some, it’s the possibility of making money. And for others, they like to see someone’s smile so they are motivated to do something for them. Whatever motivates you the most is what you can use to make sure things get done in your life. Yup, even if you don’t want to choose that particular something in particular as your motivation. If it works, use it.
Again, I’ll walk you through a technique at the end of the article to help you utilize what motivates you so that you can apply it in many areas of your life.
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When you hear the term motivation, many people tend to think of it as being positive. Like you’re motivated to take action. i.e. “I’m motivated to make money!”
However, motivation isn’t really painted as a positive or negative, it’s just the force behind why you make the decisions you do. We all know what motivation is but since I prefer to talk about specifics and not leave terms as abstract concepts, we’re going to dig a little deeper into motivation.
Where does motivation come from? If you were to break down every decision you make, you’ll likely find that motivation comes from your needs. I know, sounds so basic right? In Abraham Maslow’s 1943 paper called A Theory of Human Motivation, he lays out all the needs that humans have that, when fulfilled, create wholeness. In other words, going through Maslow’s list, if you were to fulfill each and every one of your needs, you’d complete. You’d have everything you ever wanted and ever needed.
Doesn’t that sound amazing?
Yes and no.
If every single need of yours was fulfilled, do you think you’d have any motivation at all?
How could you? I mean, if your need to eat was fulfilled, you’d have no motivation to seek food. You ever been on a cruise ship? They’ll feed you 24 hours a day. You don’t have to think about food. It’s always there. The motivation for food wanes, and your need for it isn’t continually on your mind. Sure, you’re going to get hungry, and you’ll want to eat, but you’re not thinking about where you food will come from in the next few hours or days. Your need to eat is satisfied, and therefore avoiding hunger does not motivate you. Or, at least in the sense where you are worried about your survival.
So you might think, but tasting new things would motivate me. That’s right. Tasting something new is a desire for new experiences. Wanting a variety in your experiences comes from a place of avoiding stagnation and wanting stimulation. Though we could look at those coming from a place of motivation. i.e. you could be motivated to try something new every day, this type of motivation usually occurs after your primal needs are met.
What are the needs that I’m referring to? What are the primary needs that all of us have that Maslow’s research in the 1940s has come up with? I’m going to tell you.
This is called Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. For those interested, Abraham Maslow was a psychologist who took a different approach to psychology in the early 1900s. When most psychologists were focused on the problems people had, he was focused on the positive qualities in people. He believed that someone could reach self-actualization, or, the full potential of who they are if they fulfilled their innate human needs.
Maslow’s hierarchy of needs are:
1. Our physiological needs. These are our most basic survival needs. The need for food, water, sex, sleep… everything we need at the most basic level. If these needs aren’t met, then we won’t have the motivation to fulfill our other needs. For example, the next need is the need for safety. If we haven’t met the need for hunger, safety will more likely be ignored in order to fulfill the need to eat. A starving person may resort to stealing food.
Now the need for sex could probably be debated. But if we removed all of our preconceived notions about sex, and all of our emotional attachments to sex and acted upon animal desires alone, sex would be an extremely primal need and basic motivation.
2. Our need for safety. This is the need to feel secure in our health, our job, relationships, money, social situations, and environment. The need to feel safe in our home or shelter. And also feel safe inside of our body and as I mentioned, with other people. Feeling safe and secure with a romantic partner, or knowing you’ll have money. These are all a need for safety.
3. The need for love and belonging. Once you’ve fulfilled your physiological needs and the need for safety and security, the motivation to want love and be part of something greater than yourself comes in. If you’re starving, food is probably the only thing on your mind. That’s the 1st need. Need number 3, Love and belonging, really take a back seat to the first and second need. You must eat to satisfy the first need, your physiological needs, before satisfying the need for safety and security. After that, your need for love and belonging comes into play. Once needs 1 2 and 3 are fulfilled, need number 4 starts enriching your life.
Wanting to be loved and part of a group, tribe or family, gives us some purpose and meaning in life. We can have purpose and meaning with just the first two if we are completely happy being alone. Perhaps that’s a spiritual quest for some people. But most of us need love from someone. Most of us want to feel like we belong.
4. The need for esteem. Esteem is respect and admiration for yourself and by others. This is when you feel confident and have self-esteem, self-worth, and a sense of achievement and confidence. You also feel it when people look up to you. When people admire what you do or also see you as confident. They acknowledge your achievements.
But one word of caution here. Esteem is closely related to ego. A part of the ego is when you actually care what others think of your accomplishments or failures. In other words, if you feel good that you accomplished something, that is self-esteem. If you feel bad if someone else looks down at that accomplishment, that is your ego kicking in. Heck, even if you feel better when someone acknowledges your accomplishment, that is also ego.
Ego and esteem are very close to each other. And most of us have both. To finish a project and be proud of yourself, without the need to want to let anyone else know about it, you can equate that to esteem. You’re walking around, on top of the world. You feel confident, and you’ve accomplished a personal milestone. However, if your first inclination is to tell someone else what you did (Mommy, Daddy, look what I did!), this is when you desire validation for what you did. It is driven by ego.
Ego is not good or bad, it’s just a way to gauge ourselves. If we develop higher self-esteem by relying on those around us to validate and acknowledge us, then we are more motivated by ego. If we develop higher self-esteem by relying on self accomplishments without the need to let everyone know of those accomplishments, that is more towards esteem.
Either one can be healthy and productive, but usually, when you rely on ego more than esteem, it becomes unhealthy. Then you’re always looking outside yourself to build your confidence and admiration instead of relying on your own sense of self. Your own abilities to achieve. Think of it as impressing yourself. Wow, I did a great job!
5. The last one is self-actualization. This one is pretty loaded. Self-actualization is coming into your full potential. This is when everything that was missing in your life is now fulfilled. It’s the actualization of your wholeness. You feel complete. When you feel wholly fulfilled, you are enriched and at peace and serenity within.
At full self-actualization, you can almost say I’m done! All my needs are taken care of. I have actualized everything I’ve wanted and needed in my life. I have reached my full potential.
Imagine that for just a minute. Imagine if you finally reached your full potential. What a great feeling? But… now what? If that’s your full potential, what’s after that?
There’s a good reason we will never reach our fullest potential. By having the motivation and desire to get our needs met, it actually enriches our lives.
The drive to go after our needs is part of our growth. Of course, we don’t want to always be near the bottom of the list where our basic survival is always at risk. Where there’s not enough food or water. And people that live every day to fulfill just those basic needs probably don’t think too much about the higher needs on the list. Someone who hasn’t had any water in three days is not longing for love. They’re longing for water.
And the same goes for further up the scale. Someone who has not fulfilled the need for safety and security is probably not looking to belong and be accepted amongst people. Though, they may think that being with others and being loved IS safety and security, the first need for safety is still what they are trying to fulfill.
Then you have people whose physiological needs are met, and whose safety needs are met, but their need for love and belonging isn’t being fulfilled. If you don’t feel loved, or like you belong anywhere, do you think your need for self-esteem and self-confidence will be present? Though I’d listen to the argument that being loved gives you self-esteem and confidence. But while you’re in love, and you don’t feel that self-esteem and confidence, you will be motivated and make decisions from a place of low esteem and low confidence, affecting your relationships and how you can or cannot love other people.
And of course, having any of the lower four needs not met, you’ll never feel like you’re anywhere close to living up to your full potential.
But what does all this mean? How does knowing all this help us learn what motivates us and our decisions? Let’s find out next.
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When we know what motivates us to take action, or why we make the decisions we do, we can determine how we will make decisions in the future, and if we want to keep making those same decisions. Sometimes stagnation sets in. You live paycheck to paycheck. Or life never seems to progress or move forward.
By living at level 1, where your motivation is to fulfill your physiological needs – need food and water, need oxygen, sleep, etc, you’re barely meeting the necessities. Perhaps you’re living paycheck to paycheck. Perhaps you live in an area where resources are scarce. Whatever the case, this level 1 living is the bare minimum you need to stay alive.
Referring to the hierarchy of needs tells us that it will be difficult to reach level 2 safety and level 3 love and belonging. That doesn’t mean we aren’t safe or we aren’t loved, it just means our motivation derives from the needs at level 1. Because the needs at level 1 are barely being met, our motivation is to satisfy those needs more than the others.
Was there ever a time in your life where your decisions were based on your needs to survive? Where unless you worked on it every day, you weren’t going to eat? When you’re in that place, how motivated are you to seek admiration or finish a project to get some self-esteem? Or how about looking to seek out love and belonging.
I’m going to say you’re not very motivated at all. You realize that, just like they tell you while you’re waiting to take off from the airport, you need to put the oxygen mask on yourself before helping anyone else.
This is what living at level 1 feels like. Your mission every day is to provide for yourself, and perhaps those around you.
I don’t have a solution to this except to be aware that people you know may be going through this right now. By living in level 1, every decision you make will be motivated by the desire to meet those basic needs. Do you know anyone who seems to be making a lot of dumb mistakes in life, and they’re just barely surviving? The choices they make may seem strange to you, but when you think that they might be in a place where their level 1 needs aren’t being met (or even if they are, but they believe they are worse off than they really are), then everything else is unimportant. They may break the law, they may hurt others or keep falling victim to things. No matter what, if they continue to be motivated by their level 1 needs, they cannot possibly experience anything higher than barely surviving.
The level 2 needs of safety and security are where many people are right now. The decisions they make come from a place of wanting to meet the need to be safe, to stay away from danger, to stay comfortable, and not take any risks. They may not speak up to defend themselves. They may stay in a lousy situation because it’s quote safer that way.
When you are motivated by the need for safety, you aren’t looking beyond that into love, connection, and belonging. It’s hard to make room in your heart when you don’t feel safe.
Think about the person in your life that you want to love, but don’t feel safe doing so. That person could be warm-hearted, but dangerous when he or she loses their temper. So you distance yourself and keep yourself safe. You are motivated by level 2 of safety, so your level 3 of love and belonging is not even on the radar anymore.
How about if you live in a dangerous area? Though having someone who loves you may help give you comfort, and a sense of security, if they didn’t provide that, could you still have it in your heart to open yourself up to love and affection of any kind? Level 2 safety and security wins out over and over again.
Many of us want our level 3 love needs met, but need to get our level 2 safety needs met first to be vulnerable and open and willing enough to love and enjoy belonging to a part of something bigger than ourselves.
When you are motivated by level 2 safety, all your decisions have that in mind.
One time I asked my wife what her most important values in a relationship were. We were able to narrow them down to 5 things. The top value? Safety. The number 1 value in a relationship for her was safety.
Back then, I didn’t realize it, but I was completely compromising her need to feel safe. Every time I judged her, or gave her a look, or did something that caused her not to feel safe around me, she distanced herself from me. The love she felt towards me was being chipped away at bit by bit. And soon, there was a breaking point. She now made decisions based on her need for safety, not for love and belonging.
This obviously is a recipe for disaster in a marriage. But if you feel unsafe, your behavior will always be motivated by the desire to feel safe. This will tear a marriage apart.
But let’s say that your level 1 needs are met. You’re not barely surviving, you know where your next meal is coming from. You feel fairly secure and at ease where you live and being with the people around you, fulfilling your level 2 safety needs. And now you are motivated by your level 3 needs of love and belonging.
Your behavior at level 3 is when you are ready to and wanting to be loved. And love is subjective and highly interpretable, of course. But there is a sense that you want to belong to someone or a group of people. Whether in a relationship, at work, at church, or in social gatherings.
When you want to meet the level 3 needs of love and belonging, you will make decisions that always move you towards that.
Remember, being at a certain level just means you don’t have enough of that in your life. So if you are trying to meet the level 3 love needs, that just means that you are not fulfilled in that area, and will likely not be fulfilled by levels 4 and 5 above that.
But think about your actions over the past year. Think about the decisions you’ve made, and what motivated you to make those decisions. Knowing what level you were at when you made those decisions will help you understand why you made them.
The reason you want to know why you made them is so that you don’t repeat what you don’t have to repeat in the future. In other words, sometimes we think that a certain decision is the right one, and believe that it’s the only one because that’s the one that worked before.
Alright, let me reword that, because it was sort of confusing.
Let’s say you got angry at a co-worker because they promised to take care of a project but didn’t. We’ll just say they forgot. Think about what motivated you to get angry. You probably thought about the consequences of what will happen to YOU because they didn’t get that project completed. Your anger was probably motivated by your level 2 safety and security needs. By them not finishing the project, it could affect your paycheck, or even your job, which is a direct correlation to wanting security knowing there’s a paycheck coming in every week.
But let’s say it happens again, but this time you choose to respond from a higher level. Perhaps level 5, the top level of self-actualization, where you are not worried about your lower needs. You are always seeking to reach your full potential. It’s a place of growing and learning, but not lack or deficiency.
If you respond from a place of level 2 security, your emotions will certainly kick in, and you may get quite angry again. They messed up before, and you got angry out of fear. Now they mess up again, and you can check in with yourself and figure out from which place you want to respond.
If you respond from a level 5 of self-actualization, you will already have the level 4 confidence and self-esteem you need to handle the situation differently. Since you responded from the needs of safety and security before, an automatic reaction might be to respond that way again. After all, we humans love patterns. We will follow a pattern until something interrupts it, or it stops working.
By responding from a place of confidence and self-esteem, you are interrupting a pattern. You are not repeating a behavior that might have been unproductive in the past. And that’s what I mean when I say it’s good to know why you make your decisions and what motivates those decisions, because sometimes we’re just on autopilot, doing things the same way we’ve always done them because that’s what worked before.
Meeting our level 4 needs of esteem starts bringing us out of deficiency and into feeling good about ourselves. We may be motivated to seek out admiration or feelings of accomplishment, but this is also ego territory so we need to be careful which one fills up.
At level 4 esteem, We are meeting our physiological needs, our safety needs, our love needs, and now we are behaving and making decisions based on the need to be respected, admired, and seen as competent. This is an internal process more than anything. It’s really how you feel about yourself.
When you check in, how do you feel about yourself? Do you respect yourself? Do you admire yourself, as strange as that may sound? How about a sense of accomplishment or confidence in who you are? If you are not having these thoughts or feeling about yourself, then your behavior will come from a place of lack, wanting to fill those gaps or voids.
You could get asked to give a presentation on something you know well, but say no because you are motivated by your need for esteem.
But, if you made the decision based on your level 5 need of reaching your full potential, you’d probably jump at the opportunity to improve yourself.
And that’s where we are going with all of this. It’s great to know that I am at a certain level of need, but what can I do about it?
You can start by asking yourself what you want out of life. Do you want to always be seeking your basic needs? Do you want to always come from a place of feeling a lack of safety or security? Do you want to continually try to fulfill your need for love and belonging?
What if you chose to behave as if all your needs were met, except the need to reach your potential? To learn as much as you can? To grow into the person you want to be? What if that’s how you could respond to events that happen in your life?
Level 5 is self-actualization. When you are motivated by your need to want to reach completeness or wholeness in yourself or grow to your fullest potential, your decisions will be much different. Your behavior and actions will be much different.
Think about the example I gave earlier about getting angry with your co-worker for not finishing that project. If you decided to respond from a place of fulfilling your need to reach your highest potential, do you believe you’d still get angry? Maybe you’d respond by practicing your assertiveness instead. Maybe instead of saying, You son of a …
You’d instead say, “When I asked you to get it done by Thursday, I needed it done by Thursday. I am disappointed in you.” This is assertive and confident.
When you practice coming from a level 5 place of meeting your need to reach your highest potential, you are always behaving from a more wholesome place.
Some people believe that when all of your behavior comes from this place, the other 4 levels actually fall into place. I’m not sure I disagree with that. Ever since I started honoring my personal boundaries, I’ve noticed the other things do seem to take care of themselves.
I don’t mind being assertive and speaking my mind to people, I am always seeking opportunities to grow and learn new things. I am taking risks by doing things I’m afraid to do like when I started talking to authors and speakers – people who I felt knew a lot more than I did. I just threw myself into the fire so to speak, in order to grow and learn at a rapid rate.
It was a risk in the sense that I was scared to fail. But I knew that whether I failed or not, I was going to learn whatever it was I needed to learn so I wouldn’t be afraid next time. Making decisions from a place of wanting to learn and grow at all times is empowering. And it’s not always easy. Especially if you are really stuck at level 1 or 2.
I’m not denying that you could be stuck very low on the chart. But no matter where you are, from what place CAN you respond to life’s challenges?
Can you behave as if you are safe when you are not? Can you behave as if you are loved when you are not (and you are, I don’t care if you heard differently)? Can you behave as if people see you as confident and assertive?
When you can behave and respond to the world from a higher level of need, according to Maslow’s chart that is, then you are starting the process of having the needs below that fulfill themselves automatically.
There are always exceptions to everything. And I’m not saying just forego your basic needs and things will just happen magically. You still need to take the steps to live, survive and thrive in the world. What I am saying is that when you learn to respond as if your needs are met, you will find yourself taking bigger steps to get what you want and need in life.
If you’re at the bottom, and you’re used to taking two steps forward, then two steps back, then behaving from a place where you want to learn and grow and reach your potential may allow you to take 3 steps forward next time.
Motivation is the inner drive to do something more than you would normally do. If you want more from life, your motivations will push you in the direction you want to go. Being motivated is a lot easier than pushing through something.
When you are motivated to fulfill your need to grow and learn and be the most you can be, you might surprise yourself at how far you’ll go to make that happen.
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In this article, I repeated the levels over and over again so that you would memorize them (not that you have to) but sometimes it’s helpful to know where you are on the scale. It’s even more helpful to know where someone else is. Behaving from higher levels also drives us to help others. When we know from where their decisions and behaviors arise, we may be able to better understand why they do the things they do.
Also, remember that even if you’ve got at least 4 of the 5 levels mastered, you can still be at a level one in a heartbeat. If you find yourself on a sinking ship, you will suddenly find yourself at a level 1 physiological (being able to breathe and not drown) and level 2 safety (pretty much the same thing in this case).
For the purpose of this article, I chose to talk about what motivates us over and over again, instead of unusual or life-threatening circumstances. But knowing how your motivation changes depending on the situation can be quite helpful to know. Sometimes you may be able to respond more productively in a situation instead of reacting out of fear where you may lose your faculties.
So here’s a quick recap:
- Level 1 needs are physiological. That just means the basics we need for survival. Food, water, sex, sleep, etc.
- Level 2 needs are safety and security. You will behave from this level if you don’t feel safe both physically and emotionally.
- Level 3 needs are love and belonging. We want to be loved and feel like we are part of a group or family of some sort
- Level 4 needs are for self-esteem and confidence. This is how we feel about ourselves.
- Level 5 is self-actualization. This is the need to reach our fullest potential. Always wanting to grow and learn more to reach higher and higher levels of wholeness. I didn’t mention this earlier, but this is where what you love to do is expressed and brought into the world. This is where you are motivated to express fully who you are and what you do.
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So, remember I said I’d walk you through a technique at the end of this article? I’m motivated to do it now.
This is a fun exercise that you’ll need to concentrate on for just a couple of minutes. If you’re driving, it’s not a good idea to do this exercise right now.
Picture yourself at a stoplight, waiting for it to turn green. Even if you’re not a driver, you can still imagine this.
You’re in a car, waiting for that light to turn green. You look out your windshield, and slightly upward, and see the light. It’s still red. There’s no other traffic anywhere, so this light is really getting you antsy to move.
It’s a sunny day, and you have the window down. And the light is still red.
In the distance, you hear a car blasting some old 80s tune on their stereo (eye of the tiger).
You look at the light, still red. You rev your engine a little, just to pass the time, but also to prepare for this green light you know is coming!
Waiting… getting a little impatient. Waiting… then it turns green! (screech) and you step on the gas!
Finally! Talk about being motivated to move!
Alright, now that we finally got past the light, we’re on the road and heading to our destination.
That’s a good example of something that motivates you. When the light turns green, you are motivated to go.
Think of something that you are totally procrastinating on. Think of that thing you are either delaying or just holding off on, but you know you gotta do it. You know you gotta get it done. Or at least get it started. Got it? If you need more time, just hit pause.
Picture yourself at this thing you have to do. No matter what it is, just picture it ahead of you, and slightly upwards. As if the image of what you need to do is in the same place as that stop light was in the last exercise.
And notice how what you need to do isn’t happening yet. It’s waiting for you to take care of it and start this thing. Even if it’s odd to think of this image in this way, you can still do this.
You’re standing there, and this thing is waiting for you to start on it. You look slightly up at it and see that it isn’t finished. It’s still sitting or floating there. There are no other projects or things you need to do anywhere, but this thing is getting really antsy for you to move.
It’s a sunny day, and you may be inside or out. But this thing is still there, not getting done.
In the distance, you hear some old 80s tune blasting from someone’s stereo (eye of the tiger).
You look at what you need to get started on now, and it still isn’t done. You look at the calendar, and you see all the time that has gone by, and this thing still isn’t done. You’re getting a little antsy yourself. (rev engine) So you start tapping your foot thinking that it’s time to start this thing now. You know that waiting too long is just too long and soon it will be too late. You realize that you need to prepare to move on this thing right away. Maybe you’re waiting for a signal to start. You know that action needs to happen very, very soon.
And you’re waiting… (rev) getting a little impatient. Waiting… then you get the green light to GO! (screech) and you step on the gas to get working on this thing! You are moving. You are going to do this thing now! You are on the road and heading to your destination.
When you have something that you really want to get moving on, do this little exercise. If you really engage and do the process, experience it as if it’s really happening, you will experience motivation to start or continue working on that thing you’ve been holding off on.
Anyway, hope that was fun and motivating for you.
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Well, thanks for pointing out my ego, Paul! Haha! 🙂 Seriously, I know this intellectually and have studied Maslow, but you really explained it very well and even unveiled some new discoveries for me. Next time I want to call someone an SOB, I’ll think, “Go to level-5, Amber!” Another great episode.
I take great comfort knowing I pointed out your ego. Ha ha! Thanks so much for your comment! Glad you got something new too! Not too many people have studied his work. So, I’m honored. : )
Paul – hitting so close to home! Thank you so much for this ep. I love how you talk about our motivation in direct relation to our needs. Some people wonder why they’re not motivated (or they tell themselves “I’ll do that later because I don’t feel like doing it now.”) When you understand what drives you and what motivates you (your “why”), then it becomes much easier to drive towards your goals because you have in mind exactly why you’re doing it. Thanks for this!
Yes! You get it. Excellent takeaway. So glad you took the time to add your valuable comment. When your motivations shift, so do your results. Love it! Thank you Kate.
Love the part on the recognition of partner’s need. I’ve never really thought about it like that but moving forward, I think this will help tremendously!
Hey, thanks a lot for the comment Ryan! Sometimes just fulfilling someone else’s needs can fulfill our own.
I love what you say about relationships suffering when partners are at different levels – I think it’s the same with friends and in business. It’s good to surround ourselves with those on the same ‘pyramid level’ if possible. The graphic above is really eye-opening, and makes me think about how we can work with and help others based on where they fall on this scale.
So true! Same needs = common interests and goals. Great point Charlie. Thanks so much for your comment.
Listening and trying to understand the other person’s needs… interesting and kinda obvious when you say it. I think I need to dial back on the “type A” thing a bit and listen more. Thanks for the reminder Paul!
Ha ha, thanks Frank! Always a good idea to do some introspection, with or without this show ; )
I appreciate your comment.
This is great Paul! I have to agree on you at the point that decision making depends on needs. it also keeps us motivated to reach our goal. a very interesting and great show!
Thank you sir! I appreciate that feedback. Keeps me “motivated” 🙂
Like the intro vid!! Really like this insight: Ego is basing your emotions on the acceptance or non-acceptance of others, where self-esteem comes from within. Thanks Paul!
Ha ha, thank you! And such an important point. You got it man!
Paul, what a great episode! I just love your video too… This is so great to realize “If every need was fulfilled, you’d lack motivation” <== I sometimes need to be reminded to enjoy the journey, instead of being so goal-oriented and this is a great reminder of why, because we should always be loving our journey AND eager for more fun in the process!
Great way to look at it Maritza! The journey is a process of fulfilling needs and experiencing life. Glad we’ll always have a need to fulfill. And, we’ll never experience all that life has to offer, so it’s a never-ending journey.
Thank you so much!
What a great episode! So interesting to learn about the motivation behind my decision making and it particularly made me think of the decisions regarding my kids. WOW! Really enjoyed it! Great video too…I want to do the same for each episode of my podcast. Love it!!
Oh cool! Never thought about that, helping with understanding your kids. That’s great! Once you fulfill their lower level needs, you can change their motivations. Great input Celest! And thanks for your feedback on the video. I’ll be creating more as intros from this point on.
Thank you again for your comment!
Maslow’s Hierarchy is at the basis of the structure for my favorite sales presentation. I know this is focused on the self, but in sales, this is a great way to target needs and find that pain point. Great episode, loving the video intros, thanks Paul!
Awesome perspective, so true! Sales really is a process of developing trust and creating understanding between people anyway. All personal interactions and fulfilling needs when it comes down to it. Thank you so much for your comment!
I remember doing Maslow’s hierarchy of Needs at Uni. An interesting point that if all our needs were filled we would lack motivation. I hadn’t thought of it like that before. A wonderful feeling when unfilled needs are met.
Great way to put it. We’re all looking for that “wonderful feeling” I think!