Confidence Archives - The Overwhelmed Brain

Building Self-Esteem and Self-Worth, While Avoiding the Ego Trap

July 20, 2014 By Paul Colaianni 21 Comments

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Building Self-Esteem and Self-Worth, While Avoiding the Ego Trap

Self-worth is how you perceive yourself through other people’s eyes. Self-esteem is how confident and worthy you feel about yourself.

Your self-esteem can be crushed if you are around people that do not recognize your worth. And after years of low self-worth, you may feel like a loser who doesn’t deserve good things in life. On top of that, if you work hard at developing your worth and esteem, your ego can come in and try to spoil things even more.

There are ways to build and nurture all three of these so that you can tackle life a lot easier when the challenges present themselves. [Read more…]

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Vulnerability Can Be a Place of Strength

June 16, 2014 By Paul Colaianni Leave a Comment

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Vulnerability Can Be a Place of Strength

Many people believe that being vulnerable is a place of weakness or being fragile. Now, I will say that when you open your heart to someone, that is a vulnerable place. Because you are trusting that person with the most precious part of you. You let that person into your personal space. They are inside your castle walls, as I like to call them, and they could honor you and worship you, or they could crush you and steal all of your gold.

So being vulnerable involves trust. When you voluntarily choose to be vulnerable around someone, that is the ultimate in trust. It’s like when a cat lays on his back to show you his belly. He trusts you completely, and is confident that you won’t betray that trust. [Read more…]

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Be Confident About What You ‘No’

August 27, 2013 By Paul Colaianni Leave a Comment

If you have a hard time saying no to people, it’s time to rewire your brain.

Saying yes to a request for your time, when you really want to say no, is allowing someone to cross your boundaries. You feel it inside and out. A question comes out of someone’s mouth, and you wholeheartedly want to say no, but something happens inside you, and you get this overwhelming fear that if you say no, something bad might happen.

Perhaps your friend will be upset with you. Maybe your relative will feel dejected. Even your spouse might go wide-eyed, wondering where this new “attitude” came from. [Read more…]

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