The Overwhelmed Brain

Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

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Are you living your life on a foundation of fears and insecurities?

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Are you living your life on a foundation of fears and insecurities?
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Fears and insecurities shape behavior in ways most people don’t recognize until the damage is already done.

When someone builds their life on these unstable foundations, every decision becomes filtered through anxiety about what might go wrong.

Relationships suffer the most because the behaviors that emerge from this place serve control and self-protection rather than love or connection.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Emotional Abuse, Emotional Triggers, Fears, Insecurity, Relationships, Self-Worth, Toxic Behavior Tagged With: I cannot stop worrying about losing them, I criticize my partner when I feel threatened, I feel jealous and insecure all the time, My fears are controlling my relationship

Some people don’t want you to be yourself

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Some people don't want you to be yourself
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Repeat after me:

“Your jealousy is not my problem.”
“Your insecurities are not my problem.”
“Your dysfunctions are not my problem.”
“Your inability to accept me as I am is not my problem.”

These are bold statements, I realize. But some of us, somewhere along the way, have learned to shrink ourselves to make others more comfortable. We learned to change who we are to fit someone else’s expectations.

And in doing so, we lost something essential: ourselves.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Codependency, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Intelligence, Personal Boundaries, Relationships, Self-Worth Tagged With: I am exhausted from trying to fit their expectations, I feel like I have to change myself to be loved, My partner cannot accept who I really am, They want me to be someone I am not

What Does Emotional Abuse Look Like?

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One thing I’ve learned about emotionally abusive relationships is that most people don’t realize they’re experiencing it until they’re already deep in it.

And some never recognize it until years after the relationship has ended. Emotional abuse isn’t always obvious. In fact, it may be one of the most insidious forms of abuse there is.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Control, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Intelligence, Healing, Manipulation, Personal Boundaries, Relationships Tagged With: I cannot make decisions without checking with my partner first, I feel like I am walking on eggshells all the time, My partner criticizes everything I do, My partner says I am too sensitive when I get hurt, What is emotional abuse?

The five words that will change your life

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The five words that will change your life
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Sometimes all that’s needed to enforce your boundaries in a situation or relationship is a simple phrase that changes everything. Otherwise, you could be stuck with what you got indefinitely.

Many people spend years waiting for their lives to improve. For example, they hope that a partner will finally see how much they are hurting, or they wish that a difficult boss would suddenly become supportive.

This state of wishing and hoping often feels like progress, but it is actually a form of stagnation.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Emotional Abuse, Emotional Intelligence, Personal Boundaries, Relationships, Self-Worth, Toxic Behavior Tagged With: I am tired of waiting for things to change, I do not know if I should stay or go, My partner does not seem to care about my feelings, This relationship is not working for me anymore

They Do Wrong, You Get Blamed

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They do wrong, you get blamed
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Being in a relationship where you are constantly defending yourself against accusations that don’t make sense is exhausting. It creates a reality where you feel like you are walking on eggshells, trying to avoid a landmine that you didn’t even know was there.

When you are blamed for things that are clearly not your fault, it can make you question your own sanity and your own memory.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Conflict, Emotional Abuse, Manipulation, Personal Boundaries, Relationships, Self-Worth, Toxic Behavior Tagged With: He says my talking caused him to hurt me, I am tired of being the only one trying to fix this, I feel like I am always the one at fault, My partner blames me for things I did not do

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