The Overwhelmed Brain

Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

The Secrets That We Keep – Feeling Overexposed And Hollow Inside – Lonely When You Are Not Alone

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The secrets that we keep – Feeling overexposed and hollow inside – Lonely when you are not alone
The secrets that we keep – Feeling overexposed and hollow inside – Lonely when you are not alone
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The secrets that we keep – Feeling overexposed and hollow inside – Lonely when you are not alone
July 10, 2016

Where do you go when you have a secret that you believe someone else needs to know? Are you loyal to the secret teller? Do you tell the person who should know the secret?

It’s a question to ponder, where do your loyalties lie, and what should you do with a secret you are committed to keeping?

Also, I received a letter from someone who shares and expresses to as many people as she can but still doesn’t feel like she’s released or vented her emotions, so she ends up feeling empty and still having pain.

Unresolved emotions fester inside of us until we address them in some way, but sometimes we don’t know that we’re still not deep enough inside the emotional well, and all we’re doing is pulling up empty buckets.

Speaking of emptiness, feeling lonely even when around friends and family is a big challenge too. Lots to talk about today.

Getting Control Back – The Small Door Out of Depression – The Unforever Soulmate – Emotionally Disconnected Partners

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Getting control back – The small door out of depression – The unforever soulmate – Emotionally disconnected partners
Getting control back – The small door out of depression – The unforever soulmate – Emotionally disconnected partners
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Getting control back – The small door out of depression – The unforever soulmate – Emotionally disconnected partners
July 3, 2016

It’s a question to ponder, where do your loyalties lie, and what should you do with a secret you are committed to keeping? 

Are you at a job that feels like you are being dominated or controlled? Is there a way out of this without quitting?

There may be. I got a response from a listener who wrote before. They took my advice about her work situation and everything turned out for the better. Controlling bosses no longer drove her mad.

What keeps you at work you don’t like anyway? What’s motivating you to stay miserable?

In another segment, I talk about depression. Why does depression kick in so hard? And why is it so challenging to get back out of it once you’re in it?

No joy, no pain, no feeling at all. Even suicidal thoughts can come into play. Or sometimes you’re so apathetic you don’t even care about that.

In this episode, I talk about a small door, or portal, out of depression.

In the Ask Paul segment, I read a letter from someone who can’t stop obsessing over her boyfriend’s friendship with his ex-girlfriends and hates it when he talks about other girls in general.

And finally, I end the show with a few words on emotionally disconnected people.

You still have to do the work – Protecting your kids from dysfunction – The chain of thoughts

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You still have to do the work – Protecting your kids from dysfunction – The chain of thoughts
You still have to do the work – Protecting your kids from dysfunction – The chain of thoughts
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You still have to do the work – Protecting your kids from dysfunction – The chain of thoughts

All this personal growth work is great and all, but you have to actually do the work in order for your life to get better.

The main reason for that is because you need feedback from your environment. You test, observe, test again, then take action. You learn through your results.

And in order to change your results, your desire has to overcome the results you’re getting now. If that happens, your life will change a lot easier.

Also in this episode, I read a letter from a mom who feels paralyzed by dysfunctional family members and is scared her child is going to pick up or become dysfunctional because of their bad behavior.

Family can sometimes be toxic, especially around children. Children know right from wrong, even when they’re exposed to toxic stuff, but as long as they have a healthy role model, sometimes the toxicity from others doesn’t rub off on them.

Be the best role model you can be and your child will do much better because of it.

In the last segment, I talk about how a subtle change in your thought can lead to a good outcome or a bad one.

Taking the Opposite Advice – I Feel Unlovable and Unwanted

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Taking the opposite advice – I feel unlovable and unwanted
Taking the opposite advice – I feel unlovable and unwanted
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Taking the opposite advice – I feel unlovable and unwanted
June 12, 2016

Advice about anxiety, anger, sadness and other emotional issues on the internet seems to be the same where ever you look:
Think positively, breathe, count to 10, etc.

I’m generalizing, of course, but many times, it’ll seem like you’re reading the same article over and over again, as if the information is just being passed from blog to blog.

But, what would happen if you turned the advice around and did the opposite?

Funny thing is, that’s how I developed some of the tools I use and teach. I just take “normal” advice and do the opposite to see what happens. Surprisingly, this seems to work more often than not.

In another segment, I talk about a letter I got from a woman who “has it all together.” She found a great relationship, but then the guy left for seemingly no reason. Now she feels hurt, unlovable, and unwanted, and isn’t sure if her pain is from the past before the relationship started, or from the breakup itself.

This is a loaded episode. Hope it brings you value.

Utilize anger in a healthy way by honoring your boundaries

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Learning your boundaries – Utilizing anger in a healthy way – Accepting the limitations of others
Learning your boundaries – Utilizing anger in a healthy way – Accepting the limitations of others
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Learning your boundaries – Utilizing anger in a healthy way – Accepting the limitations of others
June 5, 2016

Anger can rise up in you because of a violation of your personal boundaries, but do you even know what your boundaries are?

I like to think of boundaries as your castle walls. And within those walls lies your emotional core where you are most vulnerable yet most powerful at the same time.

Sometimes we feel anger and we aren’t even sure why. This episode will help you learn what your boundaries are so that you know at what point you can be pushed before you “lose it”.

Also, I read an email from someone who got so angry that he forgot what he said while he was in that state. You do have a choice to either utilize anger for your protection or to attack someone else.

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