Emotional Intelligence for Better Relationships
Sometimes showing up authentically around certain people feels confrontational. One reason for that may be that you’ve never honored yourself in front of them before, so they may not have ever been exposed to you practicing self-respect or self-compassion.
If you’re ready to start being more authentic and letting other people know what’s acceptable and what’s not, you may have to ease them into the new you instead of dropping it on them like a brick. Some people need time to adapt.
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What does it take to honor your boundaries and live from that authentic place inside you? Do you earn the respect you deserve?
You might be surprised to find out that respect from others happens naturally when you honor yourself and your personal boundaries. Doing this shows the world who you really are, and what behavior is okay, and what is not.
You are worthy and deserve respect. Honoring yourself shows the world the type of behavior you will and won’t accept, improving your relationships and keeping you not only happier, but sane! [Read more…]
If you show compassion toward someone who then takes advantage of that compassion, do you back off on being kind, helpful, and accommodating?
Or do you try even harder by showing them even more compassion in hopes they will finally “see the light”?
In order for compassion to work, it has to come from an even deeper place of compassion in you… not for others, but for yourself.
Then, when you are abundant in self-compassion, you will be able to show genuine caring and compassion for others without the drain on you.
To make sure your compassion doesn’t kill you in your relationships, be sure to tune into the Love and Abuse podcast.
How many decisions do you make in your life that are actually based on what you want instead of how someone else will respond?
Sometimes it takes a swift kick in the emotional behind to get moving on your decisions so that you can get out of the emotional rut of trying to please others while losing yourself.
One night my girlfriend asked me to grab her lip balm before crawling into bed. I looked around, but couldn’t find where she asked me to look.
She got a little annoyed. I don’t know if she was annoyed that it wasn’t there, or annoyed at me because she thought I missed it. I asked her where else it might be.
She directed me to the bathroom. I looked around but still didn’t see it. She said emphatically, “It should be right there against the wall.”
I looked again… Nothing. So like a good boyfriend, I started searching for it elsewhere.
She told me to give up on my search. She said, “Don’t worry about it. If you can’t find it, I’ll go without.” But that old people-pleaser behavior in me dusted itself off and kicked in to gear. And in that moment, I made it my mission to find it. [Read more…]