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What Emotionally Abusive Communication Looks Like

The number of manipulative people in the world is probably a lot higher than you might imagine. Of course, maybe I have that perception because the majority of my clients are in manipulative relationships, and I just don’t see too many other types.

Back around 2010, I realized I was a manipulative person for most of my life. I used masterful communication skills to get my selfish needs met by those closest to me.

In every relationship I’ve ever been in, I found ways to manipulate my partner. It took several breakups and finally a divorce for me to realize that my behavior was the reason for all of the heartaches that kept appearing in my life.

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The Choice to Confront – Release the Pressure of Negativity – Can Long Distance Love Work?

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The choice to confront – Release the pressure of negativity – can long distance love work

July 17, 2016

Confrontation can feel dangerous. It can cause anxiety, fear, and panic. But why?

Why would we fear expressing our true thoughts and feelings to anyone in our lives?

If your repress what you want to express, you probably have a challenge confronting people. But what happens to all that emotional energy that builds up that never gets released because you never confronted it? There are ways to dissipate that energy that I share in this episode.

In the final segment, I read a letter from a woman who left her ex-husband behind because she was learning, growing, and evolving, but he was staying where he was. She was energetic, he was not.

The rift kept widening between them so she left. Now she’s happy, but she’s in another relationship where her loved one is 1000 miles away and neither of them can move. Can long-distance relationships work?

Why Do People Keep Crossing Your Boundaries?

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When I used to travel for work, I visited quite a number of car rental booths. While renting a car on one of those trips, a man walked up behind me and got very close.

Then he stood right next to me and started asking questions to the agent (the same agent I was talking to).

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Acceptance and Grieving the Breakup

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One of the hardest life events to get over is a breakup or loss of someone we love.

When my wife left me, I was devastated. I was completely in shock and had no idea what to do. I actually fell to the floor and cried like a baby. That’s embarrassing to admit, but I’m willing to bet you understand what that’s like.

I felt truly loved and cherished by her. She was someone who finally understood me and loved me unconditionally, and I was losing her. I was angry and sad, and felt like I was being abandoned.

I was in a state of complete hopelessness.

I also came to the conclusion that she didn’t believe in marriage like I did. After all, how could she throw it all away? Why wouldn’t she work harder at this? In my head, I asked her, “Isn’t marriage important to you?” [Read more…]

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