The Overwhelmed Brain

Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

The Choice to Confront – Release the Pressure of Negativity – Can Long Distance Love Work?

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The choice to confront – Release the pressure of negativity – can long distance love work
The choice to confront – Release the pressure of negativity – can long distance love work
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The choice to confront – Release the pressure of negativity – can long distance love work
July 17, 2016

Confrontation can feel dangerous. It can cause anxiety, fear, and panic. But why?

Why would we fear expressing our true thoughts and feelings to anyone in our lives?

If your repress what you want to express, you probably have a challenge confronting people. But what happens to all that emotional energy that builds up that never gets released because you never confronted it? There are ways to dissipate that energy that I share in this episode. 

In the final segment, I read a letter from a woman who left her ex-husband behind because she was learning, growing, and evolving, but he was staying where he was. She was energetic, he was not.

The rift kept widening between them so she left. Now she’s happy, but she’s in another relationship where her loved one is 1000 miles away and neither of them can move. Can long-distance relationships work?

Acceptance and Grieving the Breakup

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One of the hardest life events to get over is a breakup or loss of someone we love.

When my wife left me, I was devastated. I was completely in shock and had no idea what to do. I actually fell to the floor and cried like a baby. That’s embarrassing to admit, but I’m willing to bet you understand what that’s like.

I felt truly loved and cherished by her. She was someone who finally understood me and loved me unconditionally, and I was losing her. I was angry and sad, and felt like I was being abandoned.

I was in a state of complete hopelessness.

I also came to the conclusion that she didn’t believe in marriage like I did. After all, how could she throw it all away? Why wouldn’t she work harder at this? In my head, I asked her, “Isn’t marriage important to you?” [Read more…]

When People Don’t Like You – Is It Time To Get A Divorce – Some Family Isn’t Healthy To Keep

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When people don’t like you – Is it time to get a divorce – Some family isn’t healthy to keep
When people don’t like you – Is it time to get a divorce – Some family isn’t healthy to keep
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When people don’t like you – Is it time to get a divorce – Some family isn’t healthy to keep
July 10, 2016

Not everyone is going to like what you bring to the table. Sometimes people have high expectations of you and when you don’t deliver, it causes them to have a critical view of you. Is this your fault or the fault of the person who set up expectations that you couldn’t meet?

I read a critical review of The Overwhelmed Brain and talk about that very thing today. They’re not always “haters” but they can ruin our day. God-like teachers, the decision to stay or leave, and more… [Read more…]

The Secrets That We Keep – Feeling Overexposed And Hollow Inside – Lonely When You Are Not Alone

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The secrets that we keep – Feeling overexposed and hollow inside – Lonely when you are not alone
The secrets that we keep – Feeling overexposed and hollow inside – Lonely when you are not alone
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The secrets that we keep – Feeling overexposed and hollow inside – Lonely when you are not alone
July 10, 2016

Where do you go when you have a secret that you believe someone else needs to know? Are you loyal to the secret teller? Do you tell the person who should know the secret?

It’s a question to ponder, where do your loyalties lie, and what should you do with a secret you are committed to keeping?

Also, I received a letter from someone who shares and expresses to as many people as she can but still doesn’t feel like she’s released or vented her emotions, so she ends up feeling empty and still having pain.

Unresolved emotions fester inside of us until we address them in some way, but sometimes we don’t know that we’re still not deep enough inside the emotional well, and all we’re doing is pulling up empty buckets.

Speaking of emptiness, feeling lonely even when around friends and family is a big challenge too. Lots to talk about today.

Getting Control Back – The Small Door Out of Depression – The Unforever Soulmate – Emotionally Disconnected Partners

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Getting control back – The small door out of depression – The unforever soulmate – Emotionally disconnected partners
Getting control back – The small door out of depression – The unforever soulmate – Emotionally disconnected partners
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Getting control back – The small door out of depression – The unforever soulmate – Emotionally disconnected partners
July 3, 2016

It’s a question to ponder, where do your loyalties lie, and what should you do with a secret you are committed to keeping? 

Are you at a job that feels like you are being dominated or controlled? Is there a way out of this without quitting?

There may be. I got a response from a listener who wrote before. They took my advice about her work situation and everything turned out for the better. Controlling bosses no longer drove her mad.

What keeps you at work you don’t like anyway? What’s motivating you to stay miserable?

In another segment, I talk about depression. Why does depression kick in so hard? And why is it so challenging to get back out of it once you’re in it?

No joy, no pain, no feeling at all. Even suicidal thoughts can come into play. Or sometimes you’re so apathetic you don’t even care about that.

In this episode, I talk about a small door, or portal, out of depression.

In the Ask Paul segment, I read a letter from someone who can’t stop obsessing over her boyfriend’s friendship with his ex-girlfriends and hates it when he talks about other girls in general.

And finally, I end the show with a few words on emotionally disconnected people.