The Overwhelmed Brain

Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

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When you want sex and they don’t

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Sex doesn’t start in the bedroom. It doesn’t begin when clothes come off or when you climb under the sheets.

The foundation for a fulfilling intimate life is built in every moment you’re not thinking about sex at all in the grocery store, during dinner, while watching TV, and in how you speak to your partner when you’re tired or stressed.

What happens outside the bedroom creates the bigger picture of your relationship, and that bigger picture is exactly what you bring into your most vulnerable moments together.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Intimacy, Marriage, Personal Boundaries, Relationships, Sex, Vulnerability Tagged With: I feel like my needs do not matter in the bedroom, My partner does not seem interested in sex anymore, Sex feels like an obligation instead of connection, We argue all day then my partner expects intimacy at night

Wanting more than friendship when they don’t

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Wanting more than friendship when they don't
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Wanting more than friendship when they don't

I think the phrase, “Lovers for a moment, friends for a lifetime,” is very true in many cases. Sometimes a friendship can develop into something more.

Other times, a development could end what was already great as-is. Does love conquer all?

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Filed Under: Desires, Emotional Healing, Emotional Intelligence, Friendships, Personal Boundaries, Rejection, Relationships Tagged With: I am afraid to tell my friend how I feel, I have feelings for my friend but they do not, I want more than friendship but they do not, My friend does not want a relationship but I cannot stop thinking about them

The traps some people set for us by playing the victim

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The traps some people set for us by playing the victim
The traps some people set for us by playing the victim
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The traps some people set for us by playing the victim
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If you find yourself questioning whether it’s okay to step back from someone who is always playing the victim (and perhaps blaming you for almost everything wrong in their life), you need a way out and a way back to your sanity and well-being.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: enabling, Family, Manipulation, Personal Boundaries, Toxic People, Victim Mentality Tagged With: I feel drained after every conversation with them, My friend only calls when they need to vent about their problems, They always complain but never want solutions, They play the victim and I always end up feeling guilty

8 myths about life and relationships

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8 myths about life and relationships
8 myths about life and relationships
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8 myths about life and relationships
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Are the beliefs and values that guide your life and relationships truly serving you? There are many myths that, if we don’t question them, might be holding us back from happiness and fulfillment.

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Filed Under: Beliefs, Family, Forgiveness, Healthy Thinking, Personal Boundaries, Relationships, Toxic People Tagged With: I feel stuck in the same patterns, I keep believing things that make me unhappy, I think I have to forgive everyone to move on, My family expects me to explain all my decisions

My abusive ex wants me to sit next to him at our child’s wedding

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My abusive ex wants me to sit next to him at our child’s wedding
My abusive ex wants me to sit next to him at our child’s wedding
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My abusive ex wants me to sit next to him at our child’s wedding
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A mom doesn’t want to sit next to her abusive ex during her child’s wedding, but doesn’t want to come across as selfish.

Is it selfish to make healthy choices that will keep you happy and safe? If you find yourself making decisions to keep others happy, it might be time to consider what that costs you in the long run.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: abuse, Emotional Triggers, Narcissism, Personal Boundaries, Toxic People Tagged With: I didn’t have boundaries in my marriage and now I feel selfish trying to prioritize my happiness, I don’t want my past relationship to overshadow my child’s special day, I feel pressure to sit with my ex at my child’s wedding but it feels wrong, My ex wants to control where I sit and I don’t know how to say no

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