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Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

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When you don’t know who you are

When you don't know who you are
When you don't know who you are
Episode play icon
When you don't know who you are
September 13, 2020

Have you ever really learned who you are at a deeper level? Sometimes we walk around doing the things we’re supposed to do, but rarely stop to figure out who is doing those things.

In this episode, I read an email from a woman who never got a chance to learn who she is because of narcissistic parents telling her who she is all her life. Now that she’s a wife and mom, she feels lost.

If you’re lost, it’s time to find yourself. 

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Decisions, Family, Identity, Narcissism, Personal Boundaries, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Therapy, Toxic Behavior, Toxic People Tagged With: The meaning of my existence, Trying to figure out who I am, What is the point of existing?

The emotional aftermath of getting free of the narcissistic relationship

The emotional aftermath of getting free of the narcissistic relationship
The emotional aftermath of getting free of the narcissistic relationship
Episode play icon
The emotional aftermath of getting free of the narcissistic relationship
May 21, 2020

The emotional challenges you experience after breaking up with a narcissist usually go way beyond grieving the end of a relationship.

You can be stripped of your ability to see life clearly from that point on unless you heal.

In this bonus episode, I cover a lot of ground when it comes to dealing with what happens to your mind and body as you transition out of one of the more toxic relationships that exist.

Filed Under: Children, Divorce, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Healing, Narcissism, Podcast Episode, Relationships Tagged With: How do I heal from narcissistic abuse?, My ex is a narcissist and I have no closure, My kids still see the narcissistic parent

My Healing Journey from Being an Emotional Abuser

Emotional abuse is the ultimate brainwashing technique. It often hides in the form of feigned helpfulness, generosity, compassion, and love. The perpetrator knows how to appear kind and caring while intertwining abusive behavior, causing their victim to become powerless.

Emotional abuse is a method of controlling, manipulating, belittling, and invalidating a person over time. It is often hard to spot in the moment as it can be seen as benign or even “normal” to most observers. But as this behavior is repeated time and time again, the insidious compound effect of this form of hidden abuse causes its victims to lose confidence in themselves, stop trusting in their own decisions, feel devalued and unimportant, and blame themselves for being the cause of, and sometimes even deserving, of the abusive behavior.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Abandonment, Blog article, Divorce, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Healing, Emotional Withdrawal, Empathy, Judgment, Manipulation, Marriage, Narcissism, Relationships, Toxic Behavior, Toxic Thinking Tagged With: Am I emotionally abusive?, Can the emotional abuser change?, how do I stop being emotionally abusive?, How to stop being emotionally abusive, What is emotional abuse?

Dealing with selfish people that don’t care if they hurt you

Those selfish people that don't care if you're hurt by their behavior
Those selfish people that don't care if you're hurt by their behavior
Episode play icon
Those selfish people that don't care if you're hurt by their behavior
February 9, 2020

When you are interacting with people that only want what they want, regardless of how it affects you, you’re in for a very dysfunctional, and possibly emotionally harmful situation.

It’s important to know your line and know when people cross it, then honor that line so that you don’t lose a bit of yourself.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Emotional Abuse, Emotional Triggers, Empathy, Family, Lying, Manipulation, Marriage, Narcissism, Negative Emotions, Neglect, Personal Boundaries, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Selfishness Tagged With: narcissistic abuse, so selfish, why are people selfish?

“I am not the cause of the problem, you are!”

Have you ever tried to tell someone they were doing something you don’t like, or that they were just outright wrong, but they turned it around on you and put you on the defense?

[Read more…]

Filed Under: anger, Ask Paul, Emotional Abuse, Family, Manipulation, Marriage, Narcissism, Relationships Tagged With: defending yourself all the time, My partner thinks I'm the cause of all our problems, narcissistic abuse

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