The Overwhelmed Brain

Emotional Intelligence for Better Relationships

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I can’t get you out of my head but I need to so I can start living again

I can't get you out of my head but I need to so I can start living again
I can't get you out of my head but I need to so I can start living again
Episode play icon
I can't get you out of my head but I need to so I can start living again
June 24, 2020

Obsessing about your ex wastes all your time and keeps you in a rut that you can’t get out of until you take hard steps to disconnect from them completely.

That involves a lot of will power and determination. But when you get your life back, it will have been time and energy well spent.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Obsession, Podcast Episode, Toxic Thinking Tagged With: How do I stop obsessing about my ex?

My Healing Journey from Being an Emotional Abuser

Emotional abuse is the ultimate brainwashing technique. It hides in the form of feigned helpfulness, generosity, compassion, and love. The perpetrator knows how to appear kind and caring while intertwining abusive behavior, causing their victim to become powerless.

Emotional abuse is a method of controlling, manipulating, belittling, and invalidating a person over time. It is often hard to spot in the moment as it can be seen as benign or even “normal” to most observers. But as this behavior is repeated time and time again, the insidious compound effect of this form of covert abuse causes its victims to lose confidence in themselves, stop trusting in their own decisions, feel devalued and unimportant, and blame themselves for being the cause of, and sometimes even deserving, of the abusive behavior.

(after you read this article, be sure to tune into the Love and Abuse podcast for more on emotional abuse and manipulation in relationships) [Read more…]

Filed Under: Abandonment, Blog article, Divorce, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Healing, Emotional Withdrawal, Empathy, Judgment, Manipulation, Marriage, Narcissism, Relationships, Toxic Behavior, Toxic Thinking Tagged With: Can the emotional abuser be fixed?, Can the emotional abuser change?, Can the emotional abuser heal?, I am the emotional abuser, Is it possible for abusive people to change?

When you can’t enjoy life because you’re always waiting for the other shoe to drop

When you can't enjoy life because you're always waiting for the other shoe to drop
When you can't enjoy life because you're always waiting for the other shoe to drop
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When you can't enjoy life because you're always waiting for the other shoe to drop
May 5, 2019

It’s hard to enjoy life if you are weighed down with the belief that something bad is going to happen. How can you appreciate today if you believe tomorrow will bring misery?

There is a path to a better today. This episode will give you some tools to make that happen.

Filed Under: abuse, anxiety, Ask Paul, Fears, Insecurity, Obsession, Overwhelm, Relationships, Toxic Thinking Tagged With: Always waiting for the other shoe to drop

Is your compassion killing you? What you think is compassion could be self-destruction

Is your compassion killing you? What you think is compassion could be self-destruction
Is your compassion killing you? What you think is compassion could be self-destruction
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Is your compassion killing you? What you think is compassion could be self-destruction
April 7, 2019

If you show compassion toward someone who then takes advantage of that compassion, do you back off on being kind, helpful, and accommodating?

Or do you try even harder by showing them even more compassion in hopes they will finally “see the light”?

In order for compassion to work, it has to come from an even deeper place of compassion in you… not for others, but for yourself.

Then, when you are abundant in self-compassion, you will be able to show genuine caring and compassion for others without the drain on you.

To make sure your compassion doesn’t kill you in your relationships, be sure to tune into the Love and Abuse podcast. 

Filed Under: anxiety, Codependency, Compassion, Depression, Dysfunction, Emotional Abuse, enabling, Family, People Pleaser, Personal Boundaries, Podcast Episode, Relationships, rescuer, Toxic Thinking Tagged With: compassion for others, is your compassion killing you?

Making decisions that are right for you, and tackling obsession and overthinking once and for all – Part 1

Making decisions that are right for you and tackling obsession and overthinking once and for all
Making decisions that are right for you and tackling obsession and overthinking once and for all
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Making decisions that are right for you and tackling obsession and overthinking once and for all
February 3, 2019

Obsessive thoughts and over analyzing can lead to terrible (or no) decision-making, causing you to stay in a rut that you can never get out of. Or if you do get out, it’s a very, very slow process.

In this episode, I talk about what it takes to make decisions that are right for you so that you stay out of obsessive thinking and get back to a more efficient, more productive, more fulfilling life.

This is part one of a two-part episode. Part two is here

Filed Under: anxiety, Decisions, Depression, Divorce, Emotional Triggers, Jealousy, Loneliness, Loss, Negative Emotions, Obsession, Podcast Episode, Rejection, Relationships, Toxic Thinking Tagged With: Making the right decisions, Obsessive thinking is destructive, Overcoming obsessive thinking

Self-help variety – Pushy people, jealousy, body image, self-worth, self-esteem, intrusive thoughts, and more!

Self-help variety – Pushy people, jealousy, body image, self-worth, self-esteem, intrusive thoughts and more!
Self-help variety – Pushy people, jealousy, body image, self-worth, self-esteem, intrusive thoughts and more!
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Self-help variety – Pushy people, jealousy, body image, self-worth, self-esteem, intrusive thoughts and more!
December 23, 2018

In this episode of The Overwhelmed Brain podcast, I  answer several questions ranging from overcoming jealousy, people that impose their values on you, what affects your self-worth and self-esteem, getting over insecurities about body comments, letting go of intrusive, distressing thoughts, expressing yourself and more!

It’s the variety episode on emotional intelligence. I hope you get a lot of value from it. 

Filed Under: Ask Paul, Insecurity, Jealousy, Judgment, Rejection, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Toxic Thinking, Values Tagged With: distressing thoughts, Getting over insecurity about body comments, intrusive thoughts, Overcoming Jealousy, self help

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