The Overwhelmed Brain

Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

Transforming the Emotionally Abusive Relationship

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When I was first getting to know my partner, she told me about her relationship with her ex. She said that they were the best of friends, so it only made sense that developing that friendship into a romantic relationship would enhance what they had and bring them even closer.

After several years of emotional abuse and a bitter divorce, she left that relationship a shell of her former self.

Emotionally abusive people know exactly how to be a good friend. They show up when you need them. They say all the right things. They appear to be genuinely kind and generous to you and the rest of the world.

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The Partner Who Is Everywhere But Home – Not Honoring Yourself In The Relationship – The Present Moment

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What do you do when your partner wants to spend more time away from home than with you? Is that a sign that there’s something wrong in the relationship? Is there a more serious issue? Is it perhaps they don’t feel safe with you?

In the first segment, I read a letter from a man who missed his fiance’. She would go out drinking with friends and family and he would be home alone, trying not to be offended or hurt.

As she spent less time at home, he got more concerned but also gave her the space she asked for. Soon, the wedding was called off and she was moving out.

What went wrong? What could he have done differently?

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The Spiritual Lessons Connecting the Past to Present – Letting Family Hit Rock Bottom – Alone on the Holidays

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The Spiritual Lessons Connecting the Past to Present – Letting Family Hit Rock Bottom – Alone on the Holidays
The Spiritual Lessons Connecting the Past to Present – Letting Family Hit Rock Bottom – Alone on the Holidays
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The Spiritual Lessons Connecting the Past to Present – Letting Family Hit Rock Bottom – Alone on the Holidays
November 27, 2016

There’s a spiritual or philosophical correlation between an event that happened to you in your past and what is happening to you today.

You may not recognize the significance of your behavior today, but when you are able to make the connection between present behavior and prior emotional events, it’s like plugging a lamp into a socket and watching light fill the room. 

The circuit between the past and the present becomes linked and negative emotions can diminish or disappear. It sounds a bit “out there” but there is a process to go through if you want to try it out yourself.

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The Secrets That We Keep – Feeling Overexposed And Hollow Inside – Lonely When You Are Not Alone

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Where do you go when you have a secret that you believe someone else needs to know? Are you loyal to the secret teller? Do you tell the person who should know the secret?

It’s a question to ponder, where do your loyalties lie, and what should you do with a secret you are committed to keeping?

Also, I received a letter from someone who shares and expresses to as many people as she can but still doesn’t feel like she’s released or vented her emotions, so she ends up feeling empty and still having pain.

Unresolved emotions fester inside of us until we address them in some way, but sometimes we don’t know that we’re still not deep enough inside the emotional well, and all we’re doing is pulling up empty buckets.

Speaking of emptiness, feeling lonely even when around friends and family is a big challenge too. Lots to talk about today.

You Are Not Alone in Your Challenges But May Feel Alone in Your Relationship

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You Are Not Alone in Your Challenges But May Feel Alone in Your Relationship
You Are Not Alone in Your Challenges But May Feel Alone in Your Relationship
Episode play icon
You Are Not Alone in Your Challenges But May Feel Alone in Your Relationship
April 17, 2016

Have you ever felt alone in your struggles? Just when you thought you were the only person experiencing what you’re going through, it’s hard to imagine anyone else dealing with the same thing. Yet, there are many. And I receive a lot of messages from people that reinforce that. How does that help you? There might be something bigger at play here.

Also, I talk about a message I received from someone who feels very alone in her relationship. Her partner just doesn’t seem to want to include her in any future plans he has for himself, and only himself. He says he loves her and wants to be with her, but his actions and behavior prove otherwise. Much to talk about today.