The Overwhelmed Brain

Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

Dealing With the Victim Mentality

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There are true victims in the world, then there are chronic complainers who keep themselves in a victimized state closing the door to progress, healing and growth.

It could have started in childhood or sprung up when they were older, but those who have a victim mentality know one thing for sure: Nothing ever works out for them.

This belief system keeps them in a rut and prevents them from seeing options that could be right in front of them.

Are you or someone you know a self-perpetuating victim? 

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Empowerment Through Vulnerability

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vulnerabilityEmotions rise up from our core, where we are both most vulnerable and powerful. When we can live from this core place inside of us we can be authentic. When that happens we are empowered to be our true selves.

Align your thoughts and feelings with your behavior and you have a recipe for true success in your life.  [Read more…]

Releasing Emotional Triggers in Relationships

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Emotional triggers are the surprises that we get when someone we love or a situation causes us to have a reaction that we haven’t processed yet.

For example, if you were yelled at as a child and you attached being yelled at to fear, you might get triggered as an adult when you are near someone yelling.

Triggers are typically childhood beliefs that aren’t necessarily true anymore and need to be addressed to save your relationships. Once you release your old triggers, you can view the world from an entirely different place instead of through the eyes of a fearful child.

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How to Give to Others Without Giving Up Too Much of Yourself

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giving from compassionGiving doesn’t have to be self-sacrifice, it can be warm and wonderful. But we all have a limit to what we give. Whether we’re talking about money, time or energy, giving comes from two places: Ego and / or Compassion.

Giving from compassion gets instant returns of good feelings. Giving from the ego gets a quick high or a quick low, but nothing long-lasting.

Learning to give to yourself first and foremost is how you give to others. How? Listen and find out!

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Saying “No” To Someone Reveals Their True Nature

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img-4What kind of response do you get when you need to honor yourself with someone by saying “no” to them? I had to do this once with a business partner, and it was one of the hardest things to do.

It wasn’t just a “No, I can’t help you”, it was a, “Hey, I know we’ve been planning a project together for over a month and a half now, and I know we’re going to have a conference call about it on Sunday, but I need to bow out now. I realize I’m fifty percent of the project, and that without me, you really won’t be able to finish it, at least in a short amount of time, but I have to back out.”

I’ll tell you, it was hard to click send on that email. It was an email instead of a phone call because I really wanted to word my message so it conveyed all my thoughts without interruption.

In a live call or conversation, you could say one word and the entire conversation could go into an emotional spiral. Tempers can flare and your message may never get heard. The only thing that might be conveyed is that you are abandoning them. [Read more…]