The Overwhelmed Brain

Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

Surviving Infidelity – An Overlooked Warning Sign and Healing After Cheating

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Infidelity can be one of the most painful experiences you can have, next to losing a child. The pain caused by the betrayal is nearly unbearable, and much healing is needed afterward, whether you stay in the relationship or not.

In this article, I talk about one sign you need to pay attention to most when you suspect cheating in your relationship. Then, after an affair is discovered, the emotional wounding that takes place will need mending and healing.

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    Releasing Emotional Triggers in Relationships

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    Emotional triggers are the surprises that we get when someone we love or a situation causes us to have a reaction that we haven’t processed yet.

    For example, if you were yelled at as a child and you attached being yelled at to fear, you might get triggered as an adult when you are near someone yelling.

    Triggers are typically childhood beliefs that aren’t necessarily true anymore and need to be addressed to save your relationships. Once you release your old triggers, you can view the world from an entirely different place instead of through the eyes of a fearful child.

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    Personal Boundaries: Protect and Honor Who You Are at Your Core

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    Boundaries are the rules we set up that dictate the people and experiences we allow into our lives. These rules also drive our decisions and behaviors, so that we can achieve a certain level of comfort and stability.

    In other words, if you feel comfortable with someone, you share and give more of yourself. You can allow yourself to be more authentic, and feel vulnerable yet safe. These are the people you allow into what I like to call your “castle walls.”

    If someone makes you feel uncomfortable, and they’re asking or pressuring you into doing things you don’t want to do, these are the people you keep out beyond the moat that surrounds your castle. You don’t let them cross the drawbridge, because if you do you’ll certainly compromise the integrity of your castle.

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