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Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

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Can Your Relationship Heal After An Affair?

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If you’ve been the victim or the perpetrator of infidelity, or you suspect that there might be cheating in your relationship, this article will help you understand several important aspects of the cheater’s behavior, the cheating partner’s perspective, and what both partners need to focus on if they are planning on saving the relationship after the affair is discovered.

Whether you want to save your relationship or not, this article will be a good resource to help you understand the perspective of both partners.

A relationship can survive infidelity if both partners want to work on it, but there are some challenging steps ahead for the couple on this path.

This article is a path to understanding the basic components of the cheater, cheating in general, and what it takes to create a successful relationship during the rebuilding process. 

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Abandonment, Communication, Deception, Divorce, Emotional Abuse, Fears, Guilt, Infidelity, Jealousy, Loneliness, Lying, Manipulation, Marriage, Regret, Relationships, Sex, Values Tagged With: cheated on me, cheating husband, cheating wife, healing after cheating, healing from the affair, surviving infidelity, why do people cheat

The mess of mixed messages

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The mess of mixed messages
The mess of mixed messages
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The mess of mixed messages
August 12, 2018
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In any relationship, mixed messages are the key to diminishing trust and certainty. When communication is based on deception to make others think one thing while you do or say another, you introduce confusion and sometimes even a bit of insanity.

Filed Under: Ask Paul, Communication, Deception, Emotional Abuse, Lying, Marriage, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Toxic Behavior Tagged With: husband keeps giving me mixed messages, says one thing means another

Is your negative self-perception causing you to believe in lies?

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Is Your Negative Self-Perception Making You Believe in Lies?
Is Your Negative Self-Perception Making You Believe in Lies?
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Is Your Negative Self-Perception Making You Believe in Lies?
July 8, 2018
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People see us differently than we see ourselves. The problem isn’t when we think we’re better than others perceive us, it’s when we don’t believe people who say good things about us.

When you find yourself throwing away compliments in place of beliefs and self-perceptions that aren’t true, you stay in a self-perpetuating cycle of negativity and may never get out until you are ready to give up that sometimes you are just plain wrong.

Filed Under: Beliefs, Deception, Identity, Lying, Podcast Episode, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Thinking, Toxic Thinking, Worry Tagged With: Is your negative self-perception causing you to believe in lies?

The General Lies You Tell Yourself and Others to Keep You From Success

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Losing love and the general lies we tell ourselves
Losing love and the general lies we tell ourselves
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Losing love and the general lies we tell ourselves
November 19, 2017
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There’s a great lie many of us use throughout life called a quantifier.

A quantifier indicates the quantity of something. Anytime you insert quantifiers in a statement about what you can or can’t do, you may inadvertently limit your capacity to succeed.

Here are some examples:

“Everyone knows that won’t work” 
“He is always mad at me” 
“I can’t do that because no one would like it” [Read more…]

Filed Under: Behavior, Beliefs, Deception, Lying, Thinking Tagged With: communication, language, The General Lies You Tell Yourself and Others to Keep You From Success

Exploring Infidelity: Can The Relationship Survive The Affair?

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Exploring infidelity – Can the relationship survive the affair
Exploring infidelity – Can the relationship survive the affair
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Exploring infidelity – Can the relationship survive the affair
March 25, 2018
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Cheating might be the end of most relationships, but many couples have survived and thrived after an affair. There are many components to infidelity so it’s important to understand it from all sides.

In this episode, I explore the basics of cheating and what will allow your relationship to survive and heal after the affair.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Abandonment, Ask Paul, Deception, Divorce, Family, Forgiveness, Guilt, Infidelity, Intimacy, Jealousy, Lying, Marriage, Podcast Episode, Rejection, Relationships, Sex, Values Tagged With: heal from cheating, Surviving the affair

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