The Overwhelmed Brain

Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

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Failing the Challenge – Silent Abuse in Relationships – Depressed and Unmotivated – Appreciating What Works

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Failing the Challenge – Silent Abuse in Relationships – Depressed and Unmotivated – Appreciating What Works
Failing the Challenge – Silent Abuse in Relationships – Depressed and Unmotivated – Appreciating What Works
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Failing the Challenge – Silent Abuse in Relationships – Depressed and Unmotivated – Appreciating What Works
March 26, 2017

What do you do when you have to face a challenge that you believe you’re prepared for, but fail instead?

The feelings of failure can be debilitating, especially when you’ve spent a lot of time and energy working on self-improvement. It can feel like you’ve taken 10 steps backward. Learning comes with the challenge of applying what you’ve learned, so expect challenges to be just more than you think you’re prepared for.

When you have the tools, the challenge will come.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: abuse, Ask Paul, Control, Depression, Dysfunction, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, Human Potential, Manipulation, Negative Emotions, Overwhelm, Physical Health, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Toxic People Tagged With: Appreciating Your Body, Depressed and Unmotivated, Emotional Abuse, Failing Challenges, Silent Abuse, verbal abuse

Surviving the Crisis – Self-Perpetuating Abuse – Building Resilience Through Criticism

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Surviving the Crisis – Self-Perpetuating Abuse – Building Resilience Through Criticism
Surviving the Crisis – Self-Perpetuating Abuse – Building Resilience Through Criticism
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Surviving the Crisis – Self-Perpetuating Abuse – Building Resilience Through Criticism
March 12, 2017

When you’re in crisis mode, is there anything you can do to bring you into a calmer, more peaceful place?

Not always. In fact, you may have to experience the full impact of the crisis before any calm or comfort can be had. However, you may be able to prepare for a crisis so it doesn’t completely debilitate you.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: abuse, Ask Paul, Control, Depression, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, Human Potential, Loss, Overwhelm, Podcast Episode, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth Tagged With: Emotional Abuse, resilience through criticism, Self-abuse, Surviving Crisis, verbal abuse

The Abused Mind and Mixed Signals in Relationships – Still Mourning – Overcoming Your Overwhelmed Brain

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The Abused Mind in Relationships – A Listener Gets Cheated On And Kicked Out – Wanting Others To Do What You Believe is Right
The Abused Mind in Relationships – A Listener Gets Cheated On And Kicked Out – Wanting Others To Do What You Believe is Right
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The Abused Mind in Relationships – A Listener Gets Cheated On And Kicked Out – Wanting Others To Do What You Believe is Right
March 6, 2016

Sexual and physical abuse survivors develop an abused mindset which they take into relationships. This mindset sets them up to be strung along and tolerate bad behavior. Often, former abuse victims end up with abusers in intimate relationships.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: abuse, Ask Paul, Control, Depression, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, Human Potential, Loneliness, Loss, Manipulation, Mourning, Overwhelm, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Thinking, Values Tagged With: Emotional Abuse, Mixed Signals in Relationships, Overcoming Your Overwhelmed Brain, Still Mourning Over Loss, The Abused Mind, verbal abuse

When Love Isn’t Enough – Will Marriage Fix Dysfunction? – Untying Selfishness From Personal Boundaries – Tolerating Abuse

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When love isn’t enough – Will marriage fix dysfunction? – Untying selfishness from personal boundaries – Tolerating abuse
When love isn’t enough – Will marriage fix dysfunction? – Untying selfishness from personal boundaries – Tolerating abuse
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When love isn’t enough – Will marriage fix dysfunction? – Untying selfishness from personal boundaries – Tolerating abuse
January 29, 2017

Is love enough? Will it overcome anything that happens in your life?

Financial struggles, family problems, arguments, abuse, and more… will your faith in love be enough to get you through the tough times? I read a letter from a young man who wonders if love is enough to get through anything. To add a bit of challenge on top of that, what if that love is only one-sided?

 
Love is supporting the other person’s path and wanting them to be happy. When you start with that, it can blossom outward from there. If you start with anything less, you may not have room for anything more.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: abuse, Ask Paul, Behavior, Control, Decisions, Dysfunction, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, enabling, Infidelity, Manipulation, Personal Boundaries, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Values Tagged With: Emotional Abuse, Tolerating Abuse, Untying Selfishness From Personal Boundaries, verbal abuse, When Love Isn't Enough, Will Marriage Fix Dysfunction?

The Yeah But Mentality – Life After Abuse – Rejecting Former Friends

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The Yeah But Mentality – Life After Abuse – Rejecting Former Friends
The Yeah But Mentality – Life After Abuse – Rejecting Former Friends
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The Yeah But Mentality – Life After Abuse – Rejecting Former Friends
August 28, 2016

Ever have a friend that said “Yeah But…” to every good suggestion you made? How about when they actually ask for your advice, you give it, but they don’t do it because their excuse machine activates?

There are two types of people I talk about in the first segment: “Yeah, But” people, and “Okay, I’ll Try It” people. Sure, there are millions of other types of people out there, but it’s a good start.

Also, I receive a letter from a woman who decided to remove toxic family members from her life and get away from abuse. She took massive first steps, but what’s next? How can you recover from a life of abuse? How can you get to a place beyond where you can relax and feel good again?

Finally, I read another letting about what it might take to reject people in your life. How about those sensitive people that might be hurt by rejection? Is there a way to get away from those who keep showing up when you don’t want them to? Sounds like a great thing to talk about.

Filed Under: abuse, Behavior, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, Human Potential, Manipulation, Marriage, Narcissism, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Suicide, Toxic People, Victim Mentality Tagged With: Emotional Abuse, Life After Abuse, Rejecting Former Friends, The Yeah But Mentality, verbal abuse

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