Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers
Guilt and shame are two battles in two different dimensions: Internal and external.
Internally, you can feel guilt for something you’ve said or done. Externally, you can feel shame by being the recipient of other people’s judging and blaming.
In this episode, a listener asks me the difference between the two so I do my best to explain how I see it.
[Read more…]When obsessive and intrusive thoughts won’t go away, what can you do?
You might feel better knowing that won’t mean a thing in a hundred years, but if resolving them isn’t that easy for you, then let me take you through a series of steps that break them apart and repackage them in a way that might just help you deal with yours.
In this segment, I’ll ask you what’s wrong with having obsessive thoughts, why are they a problem, and if there’s anything you can do about what you’re obsessing over. I’ll also talk about your resistance to them and how it causes you to suffer. If you have been suffering from that negative internal dialogue, listen to this episode.
[Read more…]Judging others is a sign of something you’re struggling with or haven’t healed from internally. It is anger, sadness, or some other bad feeling that you haven’t yet processed that is coming out and being directed at other people.
[Read more…]What you say isn’t always what they hear. What they understand isn’t always what you conveyed. Who is responsible for the communication, you? Them? Both? Neither? It’s time to explore this topic.
In Ask Paul part 1, I read a message from someone who got out of a manipulative, abusive relationship with a malignant narcissist. It was a crazy time for her, and she is healing, but she shares a lesson for us all.
In Ask Paul part 2, I read a letter from someone still obsessing over his ex. They were together a short time but he’s still grieving over the death of their relationship. What can you do when you’re in that state?
Tune into the Love and Abuse podcast to help you learn how to navigate difficult relationships
In this episode, I talk a little more about manipulative people and share with you what might make them that way in the first place.
Association and dissociation may play a role in their behavior. If you’re not familiar with those terms, you will be after this episode.
And, what if you do a bunch of healing and growth but you realize that your partner doesn’t want to change? In fact, what if they’re happy exactly the way they are, dysfunction and all? Accountability may be the only course of action.
In the last segment, I talk about someone who worked hard on their relationship for two years. Their partner finally grows into the person they wanted them to be, but are they still in love? Is it too late now? I get a letter that addresses that very question.
How about guilt for thinking about leaving your abusive spouse? Yes, people can actually develop guilty feelings for thinking about leaving someone that disrespects and even abuses them. That’s an important topic to discuss, so let’s dive into that too.
Click here for the six reasons you may feel guilty for leaving an emotionally abusive partner.
