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Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

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Freeze instead of fight or flight – Learning what didn’t work with the ex – Healing the hole in your heart

Freeze instead of fight or flight – Learning what didn't work with the ex – Healing the hole in your heart
Freeze instead of fight or flight – Learning what didn't work with the ex – Healing the hole in your heart
Episode play icon
Freeze instead of fight or flight – Learning what didn't work with the ex – Healing the hole in your heart
November 12, 2017

What happens when you freeze instead of fight or flee? Is there anything you can do when you simply can’t function? In the first segment, I talk about the inability to move or sometimes even think when something or someone triggers you or you become stressed.

Freezing can often come from childhood when you felt like you could do nothing during a traumatic event. Learn to train yourself to stay aware of what’s happening so that the freeze doesn’t come.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Abandonment, Ask Paul, Behavior, Divorce, Human Potential, Loneliness, Loss, Marriage, Mourning, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Self-Worth Tagged With: Freeze instead of fight or flight, Healing the hole in your heart, Learning what didn't work with the ex

What are Guilt and Shame – Fearing Rejection and Abandonment – Solving All Your Problems

What are Guilt and Shame – Fearing Rejection and Abandonment – Solving All Your Problems
What are Guilt and Shame – Fearing Rejection and Abandonment – Solving All Your Problems
Episode play icon
What are Guilt and Shame – Fearing Rejection and Abandonment – Solving All Your Problems
April 16, 2017

Guilt and shame are two battles in two different dimensions: Internal and external.

Internally, you can feel guilt for something you’ve said or done. Externally, you can feel shame by being the recipient of other people’s judging and blaming.

In this episode, a listener asks me the difference between the two so I do my best to explain how I see it.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Abandonment, Ask Paul, Dysfunction, Fears, Guilt, Human Potential, Loneliness, Loss, Manipulation, Marriage, Negative Emotions, Podcast Episode, Regret, Rejection, Relationships, Shame Tagged With: Fearing Rejection and Abandonment, Solving All Your Problems, What are Guilt and Shame

Beyond Help: What Happens If Your Therapist Rejects You?

In the March 5th, 2017 episode of The Overwhelmed Brain, I tackled the ultimate challenge: The General Feeling of Unwell Being. Like a cloud of misery that follows you throughout life.

What inspired that episode was a letter I received from a woman who wrote to me that said she went to her workplace counselor who told her: “You have too many problems, we can’t help you.”

WOW!

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Abandonment, abuse, anxiety, Behavior, childhood, Decisions, Depression, Loneliness, Loss, Negative Emotions, Overwhelm, Rejection, Toxic People Tagged With: counseling, therapy, too many problems, You are not beyond help

Surviving the Crisis – Self-Perpetuating Abuse – Building Resilience Through Criticism

Surviving the Crisis – Self-Perpetuating Abuse – Building Resilience Through Criticism
Surviving the Crisis – Self-Perpetuating Abuse – Building Resilience Through Criticism
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Surviving the Crisis – Self-Perpetuating Abuse – Building Resilience Through Criticism
March 12, 2017

When you’re in crisis mode, is there anything you can do to bring you into a calmer, more peaceful place?

Not always. In fact, you may have to experience the full impact of the crisis before any calm or comfort can be had. However, you may be able to prepare for a crisis so it doesn’t completely debilitate you.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: abuse, Ask Paul, Control, Depression, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, Human Potential, Loss, Overwhelm, Podcast Episode, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth Tagged With: Emotional Abuse, resilience through criticism, Self-abuse, Surviving Crisis, verbal abuse

The Abused Mind and Mixed Signals in Relationships – Still Mourning – Overcoming Your Overwhelmed Brain

The Abused Mind and Mixed Signals in Relationships – Still Mourning – Overcoming Your Overwhelmed Brain
The Abused Mind and Mixed Signals in Relationships – Still Mourning – Overcoming Your Overwhelmed Brain
Episode play icon
The Abused Mind and Mixed Signals in Relationships – Still Mourning – Overcoming Your Overwhelmed Brain
February 26, 2017

Sexual and physical abuse survivors develop an abused mindset which they take into relationships. This mindset sets them up to be strung along and tolerate bad behavior. Often, former abuse victims end up with abusers in intimate relationships. [Read more…]

Filed Under: abuse, Ask Paul, Control, Depression, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, Human Potential, Loneliness, Loss, Manipulation, Mourning, Overwhelm, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Thinking, Values Tagged With: Emotional Abuse, Mixed Signals in Relationships, Overcoming Your Overwhelmed Brain, Still Mourning Over Loss, The Abused Mind, verbal abuse

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