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Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

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My Healing Journey from Being an Emotional Abuser

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Emotional abuse is the ultimate brainwashing technique. It often hides in the form of feigned helplessness, generosity, compassion, and love. The perpetrator knows how to appear kind and caring while intertwining abusive behavior, causing the person on the receiving end to become powerless.

Emotional abuse is a method of controlling, manipulating, belittling, and invalidating a person over time. It is often hard to spot in the moment as it can be seen as benign or even “normal” to most observers.

But as this behavior is repeated time and time again, the insidious compound effect of this form of hidden abuse causes its victims to lose confidence in themselves, stop trusting in their own decisions, feel devalued and unimportant, and blame themselves for being the cause of, and sometimes even deserving, of the abusive behavior.

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    Filed Under: Abandonment, Blog article, Divorce, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Healing, Emotional Withdrawal, Empathy, Judgment, Manipulation, Marriage, Narcissism, Relationships, Toxic Behavior, Toxic Thinking Tagged With: Am I emotionally abusive?, Can the emotional abuser change?, how do I stop being emotionally abusive?

    Dealing with selfish people that don’t care if they hurt you

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    Those selfish people that don’t care if you’re hurt by their behavior
    Those selfish people that don’t care if you’re hurt by their behavior
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    Those selfish people that don’t care if you’re hurt by their behavior
    February 9, 2020
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    When you are interacting with people who only want what they want, regardless of how it affects you, you’re in for a very dysfunctional and possibly emotionally harmful situation.

    It’s important to know your line and know when people cross it, then honor that line so that you don’t lose a bit of yourself.

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    Filed Under: Emotional Abuse, Emotional Triggers, Empathy, Family, Lying, Manipulation, Marriage, Narcissism, Negative Emotions, Neglect, Personal Boundaries, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Selfishness Tagged With: narcissistic abuse, so selfish, why are people selfish?

    Keeping your power in conversations with controlling, dominating and overpowering people

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    If you can’t ever seem to win an argument with a certain person in your life, or you feel like you can never get closure on an issue because that person keeps turning it back on you, this article will give you some tools to use next time you feel like you’re losing your power.

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    Filed Under: Communication, Control, Emotional Triggers, Manipulation, Personal Boundaries, Relationships Tagged With: Conversational Resilience, Emotional Intelligence, Empowerment Tactics

    “I am not the cause of the problem, you are!”

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    Have you ever tried to tell someone they were doing something you don’t like, or that they were just outright wrong, but they turned it around on you and put you on the defense?

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    Filed Under: anger, Ask Paul, Emotional Abuse, Family, Manipulation, Marriage, Narcissism, Relationships Tagged With: defending yourself all the time, My partner thinks I'm the cause of all our problems, narcissistic abuse

    Avoiding the Relationship Con Artist

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    Have you ever wondered why some people seem to get away with things while others don’t?

    From what I’ve seen, the more dishonest someone is, the more they seem to get away with bad behavior of some sort.

    When an honest person tries to get away with immoral or unethical behavior, they are often caught in the act and have to pay the price. Of course, you might say, “If they’re trying to get away with something, that doesn’t make them very honest, then, does it?”

    You may be right!

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    Filed Under: Ask Paul, Betrayal, Blog article, Control, Dating, Deception, Divorce, Emotional Abuse, Infidelity, Lying, Manipulation, Relationships Tagged With: How can I tell if the person I'm dating is honest?, How do I know if my date is lying?, We fell in love fast

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