The Overwhelmed Brain

Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

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Bad Luck and Great Fortune – Stuck with No Way Out – Small Lies and Big Problems – Advice For Life

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Bad Luck and Great Fortune – Stuck with No Way Out – Small Lies and Big Problems – Advice For Life
Bad Luck and Great Fortune – Stuck with No Way Out – Small Lies and Big Problems – Advice For Life
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Bad Luck and Great Fortune – Stuck with No Way Out – Small Lies and Big Problems – Advice For Life
February 12, 2017
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When is a bad thing a good thing? When is a good thing bad? How attached are you to outcomes? I share a quick Zen Buddhist parable that might make you think twice about the stressors in the world today, especially with the heated political climate and growing fears of what might happen next.

Not everything is as it appears.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Ask Paul, Beliefs, Depression, Divorce, Fears, Human Potential, Infidelity, Manipulation, Marriage, Negative Emotions, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Thinking, Toxic People, Values Tagged With: Advice For Life, Bad Luck or Great Fortune, Small Lies and Big Problems, When You're Stuck With No Way Out

When Love Isn’t Enough – Will Marriage Fix Dysfunction? – Untying Selfishness From Personal Boundaries – Tolerating Abuse

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When love isn’t enough – Will marriage fix dysfunction? – Untying selfishness from personal boundaries – Tolerating abuse
When love isn’t enough – Will marriage fix dysfunction? – Untying selfishness from personal boundaries – Tolerating abuse
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When love isn’t enough – Will marriage fix dysfunction? – Untying selfishness from personal boundaries – Tolerating abuse
January 29, 2017
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Is love enough? Will it overcome anything that happens in your life?

Financial struggles, family problems, arguments, abuse, and more… will your faith in love be enough to get you through the tough times? I read a letter from a young man who wonders if love is enough to get through anything. To add a bit of challenge on top of that, what if that love is only one-sided?

 
Love is supporting the other person’s path and wanting them to be happy. When you start with that, it can blossom outward from there. If you start with anything less, you may not have room for anything more.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: abuse, Ask Paul, Behavior, Control, Decisions, Dysfunction, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, enabling, Infidelity, Manipulation, Personal Boundaries, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Values Tagged With: Emotional Abuse, Tolerating Abuse, Untying Selfishness From Personal Boundaries, verbal abuse, When Love Isn't Enough, Will Marriage Fix Dysfunction?

Transforming the Emotionally Abusive Relationship

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When I was first getting to know my partner, she told me about her relationship with her ex. She said that they were the best of friends, so it only made sense that developing that friendship into a romantic relationship would enhance what they had and bring them even closer.

After several years of emotional abuse and a bitter divorce, she left that relationship a shell of her former self.

Emotionally abusive people know exactly how to be a good friend. They show up when you need them. They say all the right things. They appear to be genuinely kind and generous to you and the rest of the world.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: abuse, anxiety, Control, Divorce, Dysfunction, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, enabling, Family, Loneliness, Manipulation, Narcissism, Negative Emotions, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Toxic People Tagged With: How can I stop my partner from being emotionally abusive?, How do I know if I'm being emotionally abused?, What is emotional abuse?

The Formula for Friendship – Tuning Into the Yellow Flags of Betrayal – Trusting Relationships

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The Formula for Friendship – Tuning Into the Yellow Flags of Betrayal – Trusting Relationships
The Formula for Friendship – Tuning Into the Yellow Flags of Betrayal – Trusting Relationships
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The Formula for Friendship – Tuning Into the Yellow Flags of Betrayal – Trusting Relationships
January 8, 2017
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Friendships are created and can last a lifetime, but they can also disintegrate, never to be rekindled.

What makes a friendship? How do you know if your friends are truly the ones that will be there with you and for you through all the good and bad times? In this first segment, I tackle these questions head-on.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: abuse, Ask Paul, Behavior, Control, Divorce, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, Fears, Human Potential, Infidelity, Lying, Manipulation, Marriage, Negative Emotions, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth Tagged With: The Formula for Friendship, The Yellow Flags of Betrayal, Trusting Relationships

Starting the Healing Process From Child Sexual Abuse

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Begin Healing From Childhood Sexual Abuse
Begin Healing From Childhood Sexual Abuse
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Begin Healing From Childhood Sexual Abuse
November 6, 2016

Welcome Home Fiona music video by Asha Lightbearer

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In this special episode of The Overwhelmed Brain, I talk with abuse survivor, songwriter, and my partner, Asha Lightbearer, about the realizations of her sexual abuse and what you can do to start your healing today.

If you aren’t a childhood sexual abuse survivor, you know one.

Survivors of childhood sexual abuse may not even be aware that they are a survivor. I had no clue that what I went through as a child, the trauma of receiving an enema at seven years old was considered a sexual violation. It was prescribed by a doctor and administered by a member of my family, so it sounded like a completely legitimate medical procedure that should have only caused a minor discomfort.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: abuse, anxiety, childhood, Control, Depression, Family, Forgiveness, Manipulation, Negative Emotions, Personal Boundaries, Physical Health, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Sex Tagged With: asha lightbearer, Child Sexual Abuse, CSA, The Fiona Project

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