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Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

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8 Steps to Becoming the Ultimate People-Pleaser

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If you find yourself people-pleasing for love, attention, or fear of confrontation, then this article is for you.

As a former people-pleaser, I’ve learned exactly what it takes to become proficient at it. I’ve gained much wisdom since growing out of that phase of my life, so I thought I’d share with you my tips on how to become the best people-pleaser possible.

Of course, if you are already a people-pleaser, you may gain some extra skills by reading this article.

This article is meant to be tongue-in-cheek but also contains an important reminder about how people-pleasing almost always leads to unhappiness.

Are you ready? Here are the eight steps to becoming the ultimate people-pleaser:

[Read more…]

Filed Under: anger, Behavior, Codependency, Depression, Dysfunction, enabling, Family, Insecurity, Negative Emotions, People Pleaser, Personal Boundaries, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Toxic Behavior Tagged With: How do I stop people pleasing?, Is people pleasing bad?, What is people pleasing?

Is it ever okay to release toxic family?

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img-1I received an email from someone who was very angry with me. She said “You should be ashamed of yourself for teaching that it is okay to break ties with family!“

She was referencing an episode I did on toxic family members and how I said if they are too toxic to be around that it’s okay to part ways with them.  [Read more…]

Filed Under: abuse, anger, Codependency, Control, Dysfunction, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Healing, enabling, Family, Narcissism, Personal Boundaries, Relationships, Toxic Behavior, Toxic People Tagged With: Is it ever okay to release toxic family?, letting go of toxic family, Releasing toxic family members

How family drama can teach you a lot about personal boundaries

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How family drama can teach you a lot about personal boundaries
How family drama can teach you a lot about personal boundaries
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How family drama can teach you a lot about personal boundaries
February 10, 2019
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When your family has dysfunction, family gatherings can be quite a challenge. What do you do in the midst of family drama?

Do you recoil and transform into the old, pre-personally-developed you? Or do you stand firm in who you are today and love them with your healthy boundaries intact?

Family is the final frontier of personal growth. You don’t want to miss this episode.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Ask Paul, Dysfunction, Family, Personal Boundaries, Toxic People, Values Tagged With: Do you stand firm with family?, Family drama can teach you a lot about personal boundaries, When the family gathering turns into the Jerry Springer show

Giving up your power to toxic people

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Giving up your power to toxic people
Giving up your power to toxic people
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Giving up your power to toxic people
December 2, 2018
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In any gathering or social situation, you are bound to run into a toxic person or two. You know, those people that don’t look forward to seeing again next year?

Toxic family members especially can create a nightmare scenario. But dealing with them doesn’t have to be the ordeal it is. This episode helps you learn the tools you need to make it through the evening or week.

Filed Under: Ask Paul, Emotional Abuse, Family, Personal Boundaries, Toxic Behavior, Toxic People, Toxic Thinking Tagged With: How do I stop my family from getting me angry?, My parents are so awful, Toxic people are driving me crazy

Living life on your terms

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Living life on your terms
Living life on your terms
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Living life on your terms
November 25, 2018
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How many decisions do you make in your life that are actually based on what you want instead of how someone else will respond?

Sometimes it takes a swift kick in the emotional behind to get moving on your decisions so that you can get out of the emotional rut of trying to please others while losing yourself.

Filed Under: Ask Paul, Codependency, Communication, Decisions, Desires, Motivation, People Pleaser, Personal Boundaries, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth Tagged With: better decision making, living life on your terms

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