The Overwhelmed Brain

Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

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Stupid Questions to That Lead to Healing

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Asking yourself stupid questions can help you heal from old emotional wounds.

I use a “drill-down” technique to get to the root of fear, shame, guilt, and other emotions I don’t like feeling. When you’re drilling down into an issue you’re having, and you get to the point where you say, “Well, that’s a stupid question,” don’t stop, you’re on to something!

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Abandonment, Fears, Guilt, Human Potential, Humiliation, Loneliness, Negative Emotions, Rejection, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth Tagged With: How can I stop being triggered?, I can't stop thinking negatively all the time

Will letting go of my narcissistic mom destroy my self-worth?

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Will letting go of my narcissistic mom destroy my self-worth?
Will letting go of my narcissistic mom destroy my self-worth?
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Will letting go of my narcissistic mom destroy my self-worth?
January 17, 2018
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Letting go of a narcissistic parent can seem like cutting off a limb to some people, but what happens right after the moment you make the decision to cut them out of your life?

Matthew Bivens of the Having it A.L.L. podcast joins me today to discuss what can be a challenging task.

Filed Under: Codependency, Control, Decisions, Emotional Abuse, Family, Narcissism, Personal Boundaries, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Toxic People Tagged With: I have a narcissistic mom, Will letting go of my narcissistic mom destroy my self-worth?

Escaping the Real World – Kids and the Narcissistic Parent – The Isolation of the Child Sexual Abuse Survivor

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Escaping the Real World – Kids and the Narcissistic Parent – The Isolation of the Child Sexual Abuse Survivor
Escaping the Real World – Kids and the Narcissistic Parent – The Isolation of the Child Sexual Abuse Survivor
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Escaping the Real World – Kids and the Narcissistic Parent – The Isolation of the Child Sexual Abuse Survivor
November 26, 2017
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Do you fantasize, daydream, play video games or watch TV in hopes that you won’t have to deal with reality?

It’s not all bad, but anything in moderation, right? In the first segment of this episode, I talk about the benefits of skipping reality for a little bit as long as you connect with yourself in other ways.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Abandonment, abuse, childhood, Children, Codependency, Control, Divorce, Dysfunction, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, Family, Human Potential, Lying, Manipulation, Narcissism, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Sex, Shame, Suicide Tagged With: childhood sexual abuse, lost in thought, narcissistic abuse, narcissistic ex

A Near Miss Still Leaves a Mark: The Danger of the Abusive Relationship

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Back in 2017, my girlfriend and I took a trip to visit my family in New Hampshire. We both enjoyed sitting with people we knew well, enjoying their friendly faces and warm conversation.

Like most families, our conversation shifted toward a “remember the time…” direction, where we shared both happy and sad memories of the past.  

[Read more…]

Filed Under: abuse, Behavior, Control, Divorce, Dysfunction, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, Family, Manipulation, Marriage, Narcissism, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Toxic People Tagged With: Dealing with an alcoholic person, domestic violence, Emotional Abuse, near miss

Freeze instead of fight or flight – Learning what didn’t work with the ex – Healing the hole in your heart

6 Comments

Freeze instead of fight or flight – Learning what didn’t work with the ex – Healing the hole in your heart
Freeze instead of fight or flight – Learning what didn’t work with the ex – Healing the hole in your heart
Episode play icon
Freeze instead of fight or flight – Learning what didn’t work with the ex – Healing the hole in your heart
November 12, 2017
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What happens when you freeze instead of fight or flee? Is there anything you can do when you simply can’t function? In the first segment, I talk about the inability to move or sometimes even think when something or someone triggers you or you become stressed.

Freezing can often come from childhood when you felt like you could do nothing during a traumatic event. Learn to train yourself to stay aware of what’s happening so that the freeze doesn’t come.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Abandonment, Behavior, Divorce, Human Potential, Loneliness, Loss, Marriage, Mourning, Relationships, Self-Worth Tagged With: Freeze instead of fight or flight, Healing the hole in your heart, Learning what didn't work with the ex

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