The Overwhelmed Brain

Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

Transforming the Emotionally Abusive Relationship

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When I was first getting to know my partner, she told me about her relationship with her ex. She said that they were the best of friends, so it only made sense that developing that friendship into a romantic relationship would enhance what they had and bring them even closer.

After several years of emotional abuse and a bitter divorce, she left that relationship a shell of her former self.

Emotionally abusive people know exactly how to be a good friend. They show up when you need them. They say all the right things. They appear to be genuinely kind and generous to you and the rest of the world.

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The Formula for Friendship – Tuning Into the Yellow Flags of Betrayal – Trusting Relationships

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The Formula for Friendship – Tuning Into the Yellow Flags of Betrayal – Trusting Relationships
The Formula for Friendship – Tuning Into the Yellow Flags of Betrayal – Trusting Relationships
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The Formula for Friendship – Tuning Into the Yellow Flags of Betrayal – Trusting Relationships
January 8, 2017

Friendships are created and can last a lifetime, but they can also disintegrate, never to be rekindled.

What makes a friendship? How do you know if your friends are truly the ones that will be there with you and for you through all the good and bad times? In this first segment, I tackle these questions head-on.

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Changing Bad Habits – Inspiring Letter from Someone with an Eating Disorder – Jared Fogle and Antisocial Personality Disorder (the Sociopath)

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Changing Bad Habits, an Inspiring Letter from Someone with an Eating Disorder , and Jared Fogle and Antisocial Personality Disorder – or the Sociopath
Changing Bad Habits, an Inspiring Letter from Someone with an Eating Disorder , and Jared Fogle and Antisocial Personality Disorder – or the Sociopath
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Changing Bad Habits, an Inspiring Letter from Someone with an Eating Disorder , and Jared Fogle and Antisocial Personality Disorder – or the Sociopath
November 15, 2015

Segment one: Bad habits can be hard to change or moderate, but there are small steps you can take to make it easier to change a bad habit into a good one, or at least, a little less “bad”.

Segment two: I received an email with a heartwarming story of inspiration where someone finally realized she had a choice – and she made that choice! It was empowering and needs to be heard by anyone who feels there’s no hope for them.

Segment three: I talk about Jared Fogle, the former Subway spokesperson who is now being charged with possession of child pornography and sex with minors. Once a hero to many, he is now a symbol of shame.

Do You Invest Too Much Into Your Relationship?

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I received an email from someone who is still obsessed over his ex even though they broke up long ago. Not in a “stalkerish” kind of way, but in a “I’m hurt and can’t stop thinking about her” kind of way. He cries almost daily and can’t get over the loss. According to him, she was everything he wanted in a girl.

He invested his time, energy, and emotions into the relationship, and even though it seemed to be going well, she decided to emotionally close off from him.

Eventually, they split. Since then, he has been unhappy. 

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Losing Your Identity in the Relationship – The Brilliant, Worthy You – Exes as Friends – The Right Partner

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Losing Your Identity in the Relationship – The Brilliant, Worthy You – Exes as Friends – The Right Partner
Losing Your Identity in the Relationship – The Brilliant, Worthy You – Exes as Friends – The Right Partner
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Losing Your Identity in the Relationship – The Brilliant, Worthy You – Exes as Friends – The Right Partner
September 18, 2016

Nurturing yourself while you’re in a relationship decreases the impact breaking up has if and when it happens. The more you keep the connection with yourself and don’t lose a part of you in the relationship, the healthier you stay. You lose your identity in a relationship when you don’t nurture yourself.

When family doesn’t honor you and see your worth, sometimes you just have to distance yourself from them so that you reconnect with a brilliant, worthy you. Not everyone is capable of seeing what you are, so it’s important to continue nurturing and supporting yourself as if you were your own child or best friend.

When your partner has a friend who is also an ex, how do you feel about that? Do they talk all the time? Do they have to communicate because of shared custody of children? Do they communicate more than you’d like? It’s important to understand where your line is and when your partner is crossing it. Otherwise, their ex becomes a part of your relationship, which can be damaging if you’re not all good friends, to begin with.