The Overwhelmed Brain

Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

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Is your compassion killing you? What you think is compassion could be self-destruction

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Is your compassion killing you? What you think is compassion could be self-destruction
Is your compassion killing you? What you think is compassion could be self-destruction
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Is your compassion killing you? What you think is compassion could be self-destruction
April 7, 2019
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If you show compassion toward someone who then takes advantage of that compassion, do you back off on being kind, helpful, and accommodating?

Or do you try even harder by showing them even more compassion in hopes they will finally “see the light”?

In order for compassion to work, it has to come from an even deeper place of compassion in you… not for others, but for yourself.

Then, when you are abundant in self-compassion, you will be able to show genuine caring and compassion for others without the drain on you.

To make sure your compassion doesn’t kill you in your relationships, be sure to tune into the Love and Abuse podcast. 

Filed Under: anxiety, Codependency, Compassion, Depression, Dysfunction, Emotional Abuse, enabling, Family, People Pleaser, Personal Boundaries, Podcast Episode, Relationships, rescuer, Toxic Thinking Tagged With: compassion for others, is your compassion killing you?

8 Steps to Becoming the Ultimate People-Pleaser

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If you find yourself people-pleasing for love, attention, or fear of confrontation, then this article is for you.

As a former people-pleaser, I’ve learned exactly what it takes to become proficient at it. I’ve gained much wisdom since growing out of that phase of my life, so I thought I’d share with you my tips on how to become the best people-pleaser possible.

Of course, if you are already a people-pleaser, you may gain some extra skills by reading this article.

This article is meant to be tongue-in-cheek but also contains an important reminder about how people-pleasing almost always leads to unhappiness.

Are you ready? Here are the eight steps to becoming the ultimate people-pleaser:

[Read more…]

Filed Under: anger, Behavior, Codependency, Depression, Dysfunction, enabling, Family, Insecurity, Negative Emotions, People Pleaser, Personal Boundaries, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Toxic Behavior Tagged With: How do I stop people pleasing?, Is people pleasing bad?, What is people pleasing?

Making decisions that are right for you, and tackling obsession and overthinking once and for all – Part 2

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Part 2 – Making decisions that are right for you and tackling obsession and overthinking once and for all
Part 2 – Making decisions that are right for you and tackling obsession and overthinking once and for all
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Part 2 – Making decisions that are right for you and tackling obsession and overthinking once and for all
February 6, 2019
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This is part two of a two-part episode. Part one is here.

The subject is all about obsessive behavior and repetitive thoughts that keep you stuck. Whether they’re about your ex, your job, or your life, it can be a huge challenge to stop thinking of something that has a great impact on you.

It’s time to get out of the rut. Listen to both parts of this episode and learn what it takes to make the right decisions for you. When the obsessive thinking stops, you’ll be able to get back to a more efficient, more productive, more fulfilling life.

Filed Under: anxiety, Decisions, Depression, Emotional Triggers, Insecurity, Loneliness, Negative Emotions, Obsession, Podcast Episode, Rejection, Relationships Tagged With: Do You Obsess Over Your Ex?, Obsessive thinking is destructive

Making decisions that are right for you, and tackling obsession and overthinking once and for all – Part 1

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Making decisions that are right for you and tackling obsession and overthinking once and for all
Making decisions that are right for you and tackling obsession and overthinking once and for all
Episode play icon
Making decisions that are right for you and tackling obsession and overthinking once and for all
February 3, 2019
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Obsessive thoughts and overanalyzing can lead to terrible (or no) decision-making, causing you to stay in a rut that you can never get out of. Or if you do get out, it’s a very, very slow process.

In this episode, I talk about what it takes to make decisions that are right for you so that you stay out of obsessive thinking and get back to a more efficient, more productive, more fulfilling life.

This is part one of a two-part episode. Part two is here.

Filed Under: anxiety, Decisions, Depression, Divorce, Emotional Triggers, Jealousy, Loneliness, Loss, Negative Emotions, Obsession, Podcast Episode, Rejection, Relationships, Toxic Thinking Tagged With: Making the right decisions, Obsessive thinking is destructive, Overcoming obsessive thinking

Avoiding vulnerability and stuffing down emotions

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Avoiding vulnerability and stuffing down emotions
Avoiding vulnerability and stuffing down emotions
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Avoiding vulnerability and stuffing down emotions
November 11, 2018
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When you carry around an inability to be vulnerable, you can build up an emotional resistance increasing the negativity inside of you. When this happens, you end up living a life that isn’t as happy or fulfilling as it could be.

I explain this process in this episode.

Filed Under: anxiety, Ask Paul, Depression, Negative Emotions, Vulnerability Tagged With: Afraid to be vulnerable, Is there strength in vulnerability?, Stuffing down emotions

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