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Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

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Can Your Relationship Heal After An Affair?

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If you’ve been the victim or the perpetrator of infidelity, or you suspect that there might be cheating in your relationship, this article will help you understand several important aspects of the cheater’s behavior, the cheating partner’s perspective, and what both partners need to focus on if they are planning on saving the relationship after the affair is discovered.

Whether you want to save your relationship or not, this article will be a good resource to help you understand the perspective of both partners.

A relationship can survive infidelity if both partners want to work on it, but there are some challenging steps ahead for the couple on this path.

This article is a path to understanding the basic components of the cheater, cheating in general, and what it takes to create a successful relationship during the rebuilding process. 

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Abandonment, Communication, Deception, Divorce, Emotional Abuse, Fears, Guilt, Infidelity, Jealousy, Loneliness, Lying, Manipulation, Marriage, Regret, Relationships, Sex, Values Tagged With: cheated on me, cheating husband, cheating wife, healing after cheating, healing from the affair, surviving infidelity, why do people cheat

Exploring Infidelity: Can The Relationship Survive The Affair?

Exploring infidelity – Can the relationship survive the affair
Exploring infidelity – Can the relationship survive the affair
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Exploring infidelity – Can the relationship survive the affair
March 25, 2018
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Cheating might be the end of most relationships, but many couples have survived and thrived after an affair. There are many components to infidelity so it’s important to understand it from all sides.

In this episode, I explore the basics of cheating and what will allow your relationship to survive and heal after the affair. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Abandonment, Ask Paul, Deception, Divorce, Family, Forgiveness, Guilt, Infidelity, Intimacy, Jealousy, Lying, Marriage, Podcast Episode, Rejection, Relationships, Sex, Values Tagged With: heal from cheating, Surviving the affair

Does Authenticity Make You Cringe – Getting Past Your Partner’s Past – Building Rapport with People

Does Authenticity Make You Cringe – Getting Past Your Partner’s Past – Building Rapport with People
Does Authenticity Make You Cringe – Getting Past Your Partner’s Past – Building Rapport with People
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Does Authenticity Make You Cringe – Getting Past Your Partner’s Past – Building Rapport with People
June 25, 2017
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When someone expresses themselves to you, do you cringe at the thought of you doing the same? Does the idea of sharing what they’re sharing make you feel uncomfortable? Does it stop you from living life the way you want with authenticity and confidence?

If you feel uncomfortable or shy when someone shares something vulnerable with you, that may be a sign that something could use some healing in you, if you want to explore it. It’s a great way to tell just what you need to work on in yourself.

Full expression can make you feel lighter and stronger at the same time, but it isn’t always easy to show up authentically.

In the second segment, I read a letter from someone I call Larry. He said he can’t get his girlfriend’s two-night stand out of his head. Even though that relationship ended way before Larry met her, he still has an issue with it.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: abuse, anger, Ask Paul, Control, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, Human Potential, Jealousy, Marriage, Negative Emotions, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Sex, Vulnerability Tagged With: building rapport, cringing at your own authenticity, your partner's past

Fear-Based Decision Making – Wanting more than friendship – Giving it all away for free

Fear-Based Decision Making – Wanting more than friendship – Giving it all away for free
Fear-Based Decision Making – Wanting more than friendship – Giving it all away for free
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Fear-Based Decision Making – Wanting more than friendship – Giving it all away for free
May 14, 2017
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Do you make decisions based on what’s in alignment with the highest intention for yourself, or do you make them based on fear?

One path almost always leads to turmoil, and the other leads to getting what you want out of life almost every time. Fear-based decision-making is the topic for segment one in today’s episode.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: anxiety, Ask Paul, Career, Decisions, Desires, Fears, Human Potential, Jealousy, Loneliness, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Thinking Tagged With: Fear-Based Decision Making, Giving it all away for free, Wanting more than friendship

A Journey into Jealousy – The Dysfunctional Family Holiday Season – Their Emotions are not Your Responsibility

A Journey into Jealousy – The Dysfunctional Family Holiday Season – Their Emotions are not Your Responsibility
A Journey into Jealousy – The Dysfunctional Family Holiday Season – Their Emotions are not Your Responsibility
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A Journey into Jealousy – The Dysfunctional Family Holiday Season – Their Emotions are not Your Responsibility
December 25, 2016
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Jealousy is a multi-faceted beast that can motivate you to say or do things that you may not normally say or do. It involves many emotions and can run (and ruin) your life if you don’t address the real reasons you get jealous.

Sometimes a fantasy is created in your head and you become jealous based on what may not even exist. Other times, there is hard data to prove that what you’re jealous about is real and should be investigated further (or acted upon). Is there a good reason to get jealous?

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Ask Paul, childhood, Family, Human Potential, Jealousy, Negative Emotions, Personal Boundaries, Podcast Episode, Relationships Tagged With: How to stop being jealous, The Dysfunctional Family Holiday Season, Their Emotions are not Your Responsibility

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