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Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

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An Addict’s Mind – Is Suffering Optional – Avoid Healing by Judging Others

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An Addict’s Mind – Is Suffering Optional – Avoid Healing by Judging Others
An Addict’s Mind – Is Suffering Optional – Avoid Healing by Judging Others
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An Addict’s Mind – Is Suffering Optional – Avoid Healing by Judging Others
January 7, 2018

Segment 1: The addict has a different perspective of the world according to a recovering addict that sent me a message that I read on this episode. Segment 2: We’re told that suffering is optional. I make an argument against, and for it.

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Filed Under: Addiction, Codependency, Divorce, Emotional Healing, enabling, Healing, Judgment, Marriage, Relationships, Suffering, Toxic Thinking Tagged With: How does an addict's mind work?, Is Suffering Optional? Avoid Healing by Judging Others

See me, Judge me – The Distant Partner with the Needy Partner – Stop Oversharing – What is No Contact?

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See me, Judge me – Is your opinion really that important?- Stop Oversharing – What is No Contact?
See me, Judge me – Is your opinion really that important?- Stop Oversharing – What is No Contact?
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See me, Judge me – Is your opinion really that important?- Stop Oversharing – What is No Contact?
August 20, 2017

Four topics in this episode: A listener calls me smug and superior, a woman with emotional needs is seeing a man with intimacy issues, a listener can’t stop oversharing her life with complete strangers and I talk about what it means to go full no contact from your ex. 

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Filed Under: Abandonment, abuse, Control, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, Human Potential, Judgment, Manipulation, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth Tagged With: Emotional Abuse, Judge me, Stop Oversharing, The Distant Partner with the Needy Partner, verbal abuse, What is No Contact?

Don’t Want You in My Mind – Spouse’s Parents Don’t Like Me – Most Important Relationship Lessons – Standing in Other’s Shoes

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Don’t Want You in My Mind – Spouse’s Parents Don’t Like Me – Most Important Relationship Lessons – Standing in Other’s Shoes
Don’t Want You in My Mind – Spouse’s Parents Don’t Like Me – Most Important Relationship Lessons – Standing in Other’s Shoes
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Don’t Want You in My Mind – Spouse’s Parents Don’t Like Me – Most Important Relationship Lessons – Standing in Other’s Shoes
April 23, 2017

What is it with pervasive thoughts about people you don’t particularly care about? You already don’t want to see them in person, so how do you keep them from appearing in your mind?

In segment one of today’s show, I read a letter from a woman who can’t get her husband’s ex-wife out of her mind. How do you get rid of consistent, unwelcome thoughts like this?

How can you finally rid yourself of that one persistent thought in your mind’s eye? I have a few suggestions.  

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Filed Under: abuse, Ask Paul, Beliefs, Compassion, Control, Divorce, Dysfunction, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, Family, Human Potential, Judgment, Manipulation, Marriage, Negative Emotions, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Thinking, Toxic People Tagged With: Don't Want You in My Mind, Most Important Relationship Lessons, Spouse's Parents Don't Like Me, Standing in Other's Shoes

Judging Others – Moving from Guilt to Great – Guilt is a Path to Compassion

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Judging Others – Moving from Guilt to Great – Guilt is a Path to Compassion
Judging Others – Moving from Guilt to Great – Guilt is a Path to Compassion
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Judging Others – Moving from Guilt to Great – Guilt is a Path to Compassion
February 5, 2017

Judging others is a sign of something you’re struggling with or haven’t healed from internally. It is anger, sadness, or some other bad feeling that you haven’t yet processed that is coming out and being directed at other people.

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Filed Under: Ask Paul, Compassion, Control, Dysfunction, Family, Guilt, Human Potential, Judgment, Marriage, Podcast Episode, Relationships Tagged With: Guilt is a Path to Compassion, Judging Others, Moving From Guilt to Feeling Great

Releasing Emotional Triggers in Relationships

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Emotional triggers are the surprises that we get when someone we love or a situation causes us to have a reaction that we haven’t processed yet.

For example, if you were yelled at as a child and you attached being yelled at to fear, you might get triggered as an adult when you are near someone yelling.

Triggers are typically childhood beliefs that aren’t necessarily true anymore and need to be addressed to save your relationships. Once you release your old triggers, you can view the world from an entirely different place instead of through the eyes of a fearful child.

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Filed Under: anxiety, Behavior, Beliefs, Control, Divorce, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, Human Potential, Judgment, Marriage, Negative Emotions, Personal Boundaries, Relationships Tagged With: emotional triggers

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