The Overwhelmed Brain

Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

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Blaming Others for Everything – Does time heal? – The overworking ADD partner – Hanging up on family

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Do you blame everyone else for what happens to you in your life?

In segment one, I argue that even when everything that goes wrong in your life is someone else’s fault, you can still get the results you want by doing one thing: Accepting responsibility for your role in what happens to you.

It’s a new way to create and measure your success so that you can come up with a game plan that’s right for you. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Abandonment, anxiety, Control, Depression, enabling, Family, Marriage, Rejection, Relationships, Toxic People, Victim Mentality Tagged With: Blaming Others for Everything, Does time heal?, Hanging up on family, The overworking ADD partner

Feeling Unworthy by Comparison – Your Partner’s Controlling Parent – Breakdown of Narcissism – Recycling Dysfunction

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Feeling Unworthy by Comparison – Your Partner’s Controlling Parent – Breakdown of Narcissism – Recycling Dysfunction
Feeling Unworthy by Comparison – Your Partner’s Controlling Parent – Breakdown of Narcissism – Recycling Dysfunction
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Feeling Unworthy by Comparison – Your Partner’s Controlling Parent – Breakdown of Narcissism – Recycling Dysfunction
July 9, 2017

Comparing yourself to other people is the fastest way to low self-worth and low self-esteem.

Why do we always compare ourselves to people that are better looking, wealthier, healthier, and have more success in areas of life that we are still working on? It seems like a black hole of misery that will never end.

In segment one, I talk about one of my good friends who is self-employed and wondering why she isn’t succeeding after a few months of what I see has been a very successful time for her. She is comparing her success to those that have been in the business for a long time and that comparison is making her feel down.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: abuse, Ask Paul, Career, Control, Dysfunction, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, Family, Marriage, Narcissism, Negative Emotions, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Toxic People Tagged With: Breakdown of Narcissism, Feeling Unworthy by Comparison, Recycling Dysfunction, Your Partner's Controlling Parent

Does Authenticity Make You Cringe – Getting Past Your Partner’s Past – Building Rapport with People

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When someone expresses themselves to you, do you cringe at the thought of you doing the same? Does the idea of sharing what they’re sharing make you feel uncomfortable? Does it stop you from living life the way you want with authenticity and confidence?

If you feel uncomfortable or shy when someone shares something vulnerable with you, that may be a sign that something could use some healing in you, if you want to explore it. It’s a great way to tell just what you need to work on in yourself.

Full expression can make you feel lighter and stronger at the same time, but it isn’t always easy to show up authentically.

In the second segment, I read a letter from someone I call Larry. He said he can’t get his girlfriend’s two-night stand out of his head. Even though that relationship ended way before Larry met her, he still has an issue with it.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: abuse, anger, Ask Paul, Control, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, Human Potential, Jealousy, Marriage, Negative Emotions, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Sex, Vulnerability Tagged With: building rapport, cringing at your own authenticity, your partner's past

Rekindling with toxic family – The long-term results of honoring yourself – Even the victim plays a role – Contact or no contact your ex

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How do you go about rekindling with toxic and/or dysfunctional family members? Is it worth “going home” and starting up those old, dysfunctional, family get-togethers again?

Is it possible to avoid the toxicity of a dysfunctional family past? There is a way to return to a toxic family environment but it’s going to take some courage to be the person you want to be with the people that have always known you the way you were. I talk about that and more in segment one.

In segment two, I read a message from someone who shares what it’s like honoring yourself. Joshua says that he’s been taking steps to stand up for himself and express his truths to people that he never has before. He is showing up as that authentic person he’s always wanted to be and things are happening for him in a way that never has.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: abuse, childhood, Children, Control, Decisions, Depression, Desires, Divorce, Dysfunction, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, enabling, Family, Human Potential, Loneliness, Manipulation, Marriage, Narcissism, Personal Boundaries, Podcast Episode, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Toxic People, Victim Mentality Tagged With: Contact or no contact your ex, Emotional Abuse, Even the victim plays a role, Rekindling with toxic family, The long-term results of honoring yourself, verbal abuse

All those years wasted with your ex – When hope works against you – What’s under the stream of negative emotions

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How can you possibly forget that one ex who “wasted” years of your life? How can you possibly forgive them, either?

In the first segment of this episode, I read a letter from someone who married a big problem and now she is upset at him for “stealing” so many years of her life. She wants to forgive and move on but can’t seem to do it.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Ask Paul, Divorce, Forgiveness, Human Potential, Loneliness, Marriage, Negative Emotions, Podcast Episode, Relationships Tagged With: Wasted a lot of years with my ex, What's under the stream of negative emotions, When hope works against you

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