The Overwhelmed Brain

Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

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The cheater who went from kind to cold when caught – Ex won’t return even after I improve – Your intuition needs closure

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The cheater who went from kind to cold when caught – Ex won’t return even after I improve – Your intuition needs closure
The cheater who went from kind to cold when caught – Ex won’t return even after I improve – Your intuition needs closure
Episode play icon
The cheater who went from kind to cold when caught – Ex won’t return even after I improve – Your intuition needs closure
December 10, 2017

Segment 1: She caught her husband cheating, he blamed her and her family for the affair.

He used to be loving and supportive. Now that he can’t get his way, he is cold and manipulative. Segment 2: She wants her ex back, but all he wants is sex. She complies but feels empty and lonely without him.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Betrayal, Decisions, Divorce, Infidelity, Loneliness, Loss, Obsession, Relationships, Toxic People Tagged With: Ex won't return even after I improve, The cheater who went from kind to cold when caught, Your intuition needs closure

Attracting higher quality partners – Feeling sorry for those that abuse you – Try, try again or do or do not?

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Attracting higher quality partners – Feeling sorry for those that abuse you – Try, try again or do or do not
Attracting higher quality partners – Feeling sorry for those that abuse you – Try, try again or do or do not
Episode play icon
Attracting higher quality partners – Feeling sorry for those that abuse you – Try, try again or do or do not
December 3, 2017

Segment 1: Do you attract the worst partners? What does it take to find a normal person to date?

There is a path to attracting quality partners but it may involve facing your fear of loss.

Segment 2: If you feel bad for your emotional abuser or manipulator, you are more likely to stay in the relationship and take the abuse.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: abuse, Codependency, Compassion, Control, Divorce, Dysfunction, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, enabling, Manipulation, Marriage, Relationships, Toxic People Tagged With: Attracting higher quality partners, Feeling sorry for those that abuse you, Try try again or do or do not?

A Near Miss Still Leaves a Mark: The Danger of the Abusive Relationship

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Back in 2017, my girlfriend and I took a trip to visit my family in New Hampshire. We both enjoyed sitting with people we knew well, enjoying their friendly faces and warm conversation.

Like most families, our conversation shifted toward a “remember the time…” direction, where we shared both happy and sad memories of the past.  

[Read more…]

Filed Under: abuse, Behavior, Control, Divorce, Dysfunction, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, Family, Manipulation, Marriage, Narcissism, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Toxic People Tagged With: Dealing with an alcoholic person, domestic violence, Emotional Abuse, near miss

Are You Being Abused By A Narcissist?

4 Comments

A long time ago, I was taught that a narcissist was a person who stared into the mirror and adored themselves for hours. But after years of working with couples on many kinds of issues, including narcissistic abuse, my perspective on narcissism has broadened greatly.

Narcissists wouldn’t be so bad if they didn’t also drag other people into their world, manipulating them to do what they want regardless of the harm they inflicted. If they kept to themselves, most people could ignore them and go on with life.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: abuse, Control, Divorce, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, enabling, Guilt, Infidelity, Manipulation, Marriage, Narcissism, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Toxic People Tagged With: crazy making, Emotional Abuse, emotional manipulation, love bombing, narcissism, narcissistic abuse, verbal abuse

Those “think positively” people – Little problems that lead to explosive reactions – What is a toxic person?

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Those “think positively” people – Little problems that lead to explosive reactions – What is a toxic person?
Those “think positively” people – Little problems that lead to explosive reactions – What is a toxic person?
Episode play icon
Those “think positively” people – Little problems that lead to explosive reactions – What is a toxic person?
October 1, 2017

If you’re one of those people who repress negativity and put on a smile to hide your upset, you are likely creating negative emotions in your body that will eventually lead to depression. If you aren’t sure what I mean, listen to segment one of today’s episode.

In segment two, I talk about how the little spats in relationships that lead to massive blowups have an origin. The unspoken words are what cause those big explosions. It’s time to connect emotionally rather than logically to diffuse the emotional bombs before they explode.

For segment three, I answer the question: What is toxic? Do we call people toxic just to avoid our own personal growth? A listener challenges me on the topic.

Filed Under: abuse, anger, anxiety, Control, Depression, Dysfunction, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, Family, Human Potential, Marriage, Negative Emotions, Overwhelm, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth, Toxic People, Victim Mentality Tagged With: Little problems that lead to explosive reactions, Those "think positively" people, What is a toxic person?

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