The Overwhelmed Brain

Emotional Intelligence for Critical Thinkers

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Stonewalling – Expectations of friends – Emotional abuse follows you – Get away to get closer to people

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Stonewalling – Expectations of friends – Emotional abuse follows you – Get away to get closer to people
Stonewalling – Expectations of friends – Emotional abuse follows you – Get away to get closer to people
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Stonewalling – Expectations of friends – Emotional abuse follows you – Get away to get closer to people
October 22, 2017

Stonewalling is damaging to a relationship and can make it fail if whatever is shut down is never brought up to be resolved. If you give your partner the silent treatment, you need to hear this segment. In segment two, I talk about expectations in friendships. Should friendships be an equal, two-way street or can there be imbalance where one person does all the work and the other just lets them do it?

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Abandonment, abuse, Communication, Control, Divorce, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, Friendships, Human Potential, Manipulation, Marriage, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth Tagged With: Emotional abuse follows you, Expectations of friends, Get away to get closer to people, How do I know if I'm being emotionally abused?, how to make friends, Stonewalling, What is emotional abuse?

See me, Judge me – The Distant Partner with the Needy Partner – Stop Oversharing – What is No Contact?

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See me, Judge me – Is your opinion really that important?- Stop Oversharing – What is No Contact?
See me, Judge me – Is your opinion really that important?- Stop Oversharing – What is No Contact?
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See me, Judge me – Is your opinion really that important?- Stop Oversharing – What is No Contact?
August 20, 2017

Four topics in this episode: A listener calls me smug and superior, a woman with emotional needs is seeing a man with intimacy issues, a listener can’t stop oversharing her life with complete strangers and I talk about what it means to go full no contact from your ex. 

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Abandonment, abuse, Control, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Withdrawal, Human Potential, Judgment, Manipulation, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Self-Worth Tagged With: Emotional Abuse, Judge me, Stop Oversharing, The Distant Partner with the Needy Partner, verbal abuse, What is No Contact?

Blaming Others for Everything – Does time heal? – The overworking ADD partner – Hanging up on family

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Blaming Others for Everything – Does time heal? – The overworking ADD partner – Hanging up on family
Blaming Others for Everything – Does time heal? – The overworking ADD partner – Hanging up on family
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Blaming Others for Everything – Does time heal? – The overworking ADD partner – Hanging up on family
August 6, 2017

Do you blame everyone else for what happens to you in your life?

In segment one, I argue that even when everything that goes wrong in your life isĀ someone else’s fault, you can still get the results you want by doing one thing: Accepting responsibility for your role in what happens to you.

It’s a new way to create and measure your success so that you can come up with a game plan that’s right for you. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Abandonment, anxiety, Control, Depression, enabling, Family, Marriage, Rejection, Relationships, Toxic People, Victim Mentality Tagged With: Blaming Others for Everything, Does time heal?, Hanging up on family, The overworking ADD partner

What are Guilt and Shame – Fearing Rejection and Abandonment – Solving All Your Problems

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What are Guilt and Shame – Fearing Rejection and Abandonment – Solving All Your Problems
What are Guilt and Shame – Fearing Rejection and Abandonment – Solving All Your Problems
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What are Guilt and Shame – Fearing Rejection and Abandonment – Solving All Your Problems
April 16, 2017

Guilt and shame are two battles in two different dimensions: Internal and external.

Internally, you can feel guilt for something you’ve said or done. Externally, you can feel shame by being the recipient of other people’s judging and blaming.

In this episode, a listener asks me the difference between the two so I do my best to explain how I see it.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Abandonment, Ask Paul, Dysfunction, Fears, Guilt, Human Potential, Loneliness, Loss, Manipulation, Marriage, Negative Emotions, Podcast Episode, Regret, Rejection, Relationships, Shame Tagged With: Fearing Rejection and Abandonment, Solving All Your Problems, What are Guilt and Shame

Beyond Help: What Happens If Your Therapist Rejects You?

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In the March 5th, 2017 episode of The Overwhelmed Brain, I tackled the ultimate challenge: The General Feeling of Unwell Being. Like a cloud of misery that follows you throughout life.

What inspired that episode was a letter I received from a woman who wrote to me that said she went to her workplace counselor who told her: “You have too many problems, we can’t help you.”

WOW!

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Abandonment, abuse, anxiety, Behavior, childhood, Decisions, Depression, Loneliness, Loss, Negative Emotions, Overwhelm, Rejection, Toxic People Tagged With: counseling, therapy, too many problems, You are not beyond help

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